We Could Be Naked

We Could Be Naked Site

2007-03-25T18:43:00.000-06:00

Ok everybody I finally have a site you can go to! I will no longer be keeping up this blog so you should change your bookmarks to direct to my site. So here it is

WE COULD BE NAKED!

Yea! I will be updating the Road To Christy Canyon Blog so you can keep that in your bookmarks. The site is pretty cool and I will be adding galleries and more things to buy. I hope you like it. I do!

Ft. Wayne, Indiana and dildo's

2007-03-24T07:17:00.000-06:00

Ron Jeremy called me Friday morning and asked if I'd drive him from O'Hare to Ft. Wayne. Of course I said yes. Seems kind of dumb to fly into O'Hare to be in Ft Wayne, but no one realized that Ft Wayne is an hour ahead of Chicago. So everyone though Ron was going to be early if he arrived in Chicago. Even the Ft Wayne people forgot about the time difference. So intentions were good and Ron doesn't get paid to think about what time it is in Indiana. He told me in the car how fucked up it was.

We had a nice drive even if it took us longer because of traffic. It was stop and go all the way through Illinois and a little into Indiana. I don't know where Ft. Wayne is. Even though I'm in it I still have no idea. I printed out a map and hoped it wouldn't really take over three hours. It took over four! But we chatted and he took care of some business. I like Ron a lot. He's a really nice guy. He doesn't act like a multi-millionaire. I think he will consider me a good friend now and that's just amazing. So whenever he's in town or near Chicago I can go see him.

He thinks I can get into Hustler and I hope he's right. That would be really cool and lots of people would buy my video. Hey, this is a perfect opportunity to plug my video!

Buy my video and enter to win a date with me! It's only $20 which includes an autographed picture of me and hand made wrapping. I forgot to mention that I have to make all the sleeves for the disc this first run. You will be able to buy it later but the price is gonna go up. The DVD will cost more and DVR's play on most new DVD players. I dance in it so buy it! I can really dance!

OK, back to Ron Jeremy. I was thinking while I was waiting in the car for him to get the hotel rooms, a few years ago I never in a million years thought I would be driving Ron Jeremy around. Nor did I think I was pretty enough for him to consider good enough for Hustler. But after going to the strip club where he did his stand-up routine and refereed three boxing matches between 6 topless girls, I realized that I was. I hate sounding conceited at all but these girls had nothing on me. There were some that had nice bodies but they were in the minority. This is just my opinion and I'll bet if they pulled up their panties a bit then it would make a world of difference. I think they would have all looked much better completely naked but they couldn't do that so they wore these short/panties that hung on their hips and some of them had muffin tops which would have looked better if they pulled up the waist band a little. And I have to consider that they were drinking so all that liquid settled in their tummies and it gets hard to suck it in the more you drink. Also, for me, when I get drunk I totally forget to suck my stomach in. Not to mention the amazing amount of courage that comes with being drunk. I don't get drunk anymore so that isn't a factor with me. I got a little buzzed last night but not enough to be out of control.

Today he has a book signing and I'm going to go check out this dildo shop and maybe buy some stuff. I need nipple clamps. I find them as sexy as guys do. I'm going to also ask some more interview questions. I need the money. Did ya hear that? I need money! Buy my video! I have to pay for a hotel and car in LA and I wanted to have some money to play with. I also have to buy contacts. Ugh! Money, Money, Money! So help!!!

Later I'll tell you how the book signing went.

Naked Video

2007-03-21T21:00:00.000-06:00

I'm calling the video Naked Video. It may not be original or seem like it was thought out well. But believe me, I've been thinking about it since Saturday. I'm going to start selling it now. This is a pre-sale and I'm doing it so that you guys can have buy one now rather than wait till after I get back from LA. You getting one now will help me fund my trip in LA. So here's the deal: for $20 you get the DVR, a 5x7 autographed picture, and a chance to win a date with me. If for some reason a date is impossible (like I can't get to you or vice versa) I'll send you something that you can pick. The deadline will be the 4th of April which is the night before I leave. After I come back I will pick the winner and we can work out the details. You can pay for the video by using the paypal account attached to my donation button over on the right. If you don't know how or are unable to use paypal please email me and we can figure something out. Also, be aware that it will take 4 to 6 weeks for these DVR's to get to you. This is a Pre-sale and I'm making it available so that you can help me with my LA trip. I wanted to get this made before I went to LA so I could bring it now I need my money back so I can go to LA. So help me!
The $20 will include shipping.

The video is a look into my favorite things to do: dance, masturbate and have sex. Watch me strip, fuck my self with a vibrator, give head, get fucked silly, shower and finish myself off with some baby oil.

I'm very supportive of the story line in a porn but mine has no story line. Ironic huh? But who cares, I get fucked and you can see it. I have close ups too. I came at least three times that I can remember during the sex scene so you know that I enjoyed it.

I can't wait for you to see it so buy it now!

Make sure you add to the paypal "for" section "Naked Video" when you make the donation. Enjoy!

Radio

2007-03-20T10:32:00.000-06:00

That's me, my tits, Adam and Kyle at the radio station yesterday.
I hope you listened to me. If you didn't I doubt there is a replay. I should have said something earlier but I didn't know myself. I actually almost forgot to go. With all that went on this weekend I was really thinking Monday would be a very slow and easy day. I'm glad I remembered because it was really great. I was late, of course. But that was mostly the cab's fault. I called for one at 9:40 and was supposed to be there at 10:15. It's only a few miles away so I would have been on time. On the bus ride home I read an article about how cabs are perpetually late when you call for them. It's funny how much a coincidence that was, finding that article on the bus.

Adam and Kyle were both really nice and good looking. I'd add both of them to my list. What should I call that? Guys can have harems but what can girls have? I don't want to say notch on my belt because I generally don't wear belts. Anyway, they were cute and probably have girlfriends so I'm assuming I will not get a call from either of them. And really the reason why I do say I would fuck them aside from the fact that I WOULD is so that you know that they were good looking.

We talked about why I do this and what I'm going to be doing next. They also asked me about Myspace and how mainstream it has become. I guess Myspace is breaking up friendships and relationships. I'm going to assume that either Kyle or Adam had first hand experience with someone getting upset with the relationship status on their page. I will use my blog to say that I think it is ridiculous to insist that a boyfriend or girlfriend of a few months change their relationship status on myspace just because you've fucked.

Also, I'm sick of Myspace crashing my computer. I have a home computer and can't afford to upgrade it as often as I should. So the amount of shit people put on their page kills my little computer. It's also ridiculous. Why do people put all that stuff up. If myspace had a better system for putting code on the pages it would be really cool. like going into someones bedroom. I always tried to make my bedroom really cool when I was in high school. Then I look at that last sentence and realize that I'm not in high school anymore. 'Nuff said.

I didn't go on Myspace at all yesterday and I didn't miss anything. And today I had it up for about 15 minutes. I checked my mail and had way too many messages so I logged off. Generally the messages I get are comments or proposals. I've been on a few dates from Myspace and they were fun but I don't think I need it anymore. So I am pretty much giving it up. Not completely but I'm not keeping my profile open all day like I used to.

Kind of a boring post but I had a busy couple of days.

Did that really happen?

2007-03-19T16:27:00.000-06:00

It's going to be extremely hard to blog today. My mind is completely whacked along with my body. It was an extremely long weekend.

Saturday was a long day but it went by really fast. I totally ignored the fact that it was Irish people's day. I fucked an Irish guy (in last name only) in the video so I should have been very aware of it. But all that was on my mind was making the best video I could. The video is only 20 minutes long. I had no idea that sex could be that quick yet seem so long. I came three times while filming the sex scene and thought we had been fucking for at least 20 minutes. When I found out it was only 12 minutes I was amazed. I was reassured by my costar and the producer that 12 minutes was plenty long. I feel better knowing that and the scene should be really hot considering that I got off. I think having a camera on me made me cum harder and faster. I was really wet. Hopefully the audio is good because there was a lot of screaming from me. I forgot I was being filmed for a second. There is a close up scene too. So you will see him go into me.

I got a pink vibrator and used it. I came really fast then too. I think you will get enough of my pussy to appreciate how much I love my new vibrator. I do another masturbation scene that takes place in the shower with baby oil. In reality I use a lot of baby oil and powder after each shower. It makes my pussy shiny and slippery.

There is no roller skating scene. It's too cold outside for me to roller skate naked. I do dance and strip. Dancing was harder than the sex. I used to dance a lot and I like to think I'm pretty good. Being a stripper was one of the things I really wanted to do. The idea of all these men watching me dance was arousing. Whenever I talked about it with friends though the conversation always drifted over to money. I like the idea of making a lot of money from stripping but for some reason it turned me off. Money made it seem bad. Like it does to a lot of things. I'm sure the strip scene will be my favorite and might be the only one I watch.

I will be pre-selling it to help with the LA trip. It will be sold at a lower price and I will have a contest too. I am still asking for money. Or just go and buy something. I don't have much time left. Just two weeks. I want to make sure I'm totally covered in LA. So buy my video, my pictures, and make a donation, I'm worth it.

I'm on the radio today!

2007-03-19T07:58:00.000-06:00

Don't forget to LISTEN today at 10:30 central time!

Raspberry Breakfast

2007-03-16T15:43:00.000-06:00

I have to tell you about the incredible head I got a few days ago. I had never been with this person before and was expecting a lot considering what they had told me. I have to admit that I am always hoping the next one will be the one that can out do my vibrator. And unfortunately, even after this one, I haven't found him. But my vibrator can go about 30 miles per hour and it is impossible for a man to do the same. I don't use the same old penis shaped dildo with batteries. No, my electronic man is a super machine that you plug in the wall. It weighs a little bit but that's okay, I only have to lay it on my clit for a minute to get that amazing screaming orgasm that I love so much. I started using a vibrator so I could have a non-messy, quick and easy orgasm. Now my love of sex and the mess it creates has changed. Case in point: I stick my hands down my pants several times a day to smell myself. A smell that used to disgust me now makes my nipples hard. I also love my panties wet. Not totally wet but wet and warm it makes me feel alive and awake. And I like having semen on me. Most of my friends are disgusted by this but not me. It's like a badge of honor that I keep to myself mostly. Like last night, I had cum on my stomach, elbow and chin after sex. I wiped the excess up but I still have some on me. I haven't showered yet and I've been out twice. I love having it there all day reminding me what I did last night to get it there.

I'm getting away from my main reason for this post-the unbelievable head I received a few days-mornings ago. After a long hard night of regular parties trying not to talk too much about what I do. It's always really fascinating to 90% of the crowd then about 10% thinks I'm ridiculous and just trying to get attention. So they give me nasty looks. The problem is that sometimes that 10% is about 90% of the party and the 10% that is part of the 90% doesn't want to piss off the 10% so they try to seem impartial and cut me short when certain people come around. This ends up making me feel like I am being judged and policed at the same time so I just try to talk about other people as much as possible. It's very easy because other people love to talk about themselves.

So I'm lying back on the bed close to orgasm but far enough away to know what's going on down below my belly button. This guy's tongue was circling like a speed boat propeller. He was moving me more than I was moving myself. Noise were coming from his mouth that almost competed against my moaning. The whole time this orgasm was building up in me that started in my pussy then slowly went through my thighs and down my legs. As it reached my knees another force of orgasmic feelings went up my spine and through my arms and into my neck. As my body filled with the orgasm that wasn't there yet he did something that I never expected and that blew me into another dimension: he gave my clit a raspberry. You might be laughing but I wasn't. My eyes popped open and I remember afterward noticing that tears had drawn mascara streaks down the sides of my head. All of the orgasm that had been flowing throughout me so gently and evenly all rushed right back down into my clit and exploded. My entire body was paralyzed in a clench and I know that I must have sprayed his face. I held my breath for the first pulse to flow thorough my whole body and it was forced out along with an indescribable moan that would embarrass me if I had heard it. Then waves of tingles took over me and I regained movement and rocked back and forth on his face coming over and over.

He had no problem plunging his dick inside me after ward. He kissed me smearing my cum all over my face and chest. He sucked and blew on my cunt two more times that morning and I couldn't get up for an hour afterward. He was good, forcing me to cuddle. I am not a cuddle girl but this one made me cuddle. Well, I don't cuddle all the time. I used to when I drank a lot but now there isn't enough time in the day for me to get everything done so I end up trying to use it all up. I had things to do but I was to exhausted to do anything after that. I walked around funny for two days afterward. The second day wasn't difficult so much due to a physical hindrance more a mental one since I couldn't stop thinking about what had happened to my pussy. Writing this made me masturbate and put on tight underwear so that I could rub my tender clit on the seam and soak them up.

I'm shooting a video tomorrow if you haven't heard already. I can't promise the best video ever or even a good video at all. I've never done anything like this. Hopefully, it will be good and I do promise nudity, masturbation, showering, stripping and dressing. I hope sex will be there but who knows if the guy can perform since he's never done it before either. Wish me luck either way.

On the radio!

2007-03-14T10:46:00.000-06:00

I'm going to be on the radio on Monday! Adam and Kyle from UIC Radio's show Soundtrack will be talking to me from 10:30 to 11:30 (central) on Monday morning! The cool thing about this is it's an Internet radio station so anyone can listen. I tried it last night and the station went through my iTunes. I didn't have to download anything. It was too easy! So if you want to hear two 21 year-olds ask me questions about my life and sex tune in.

The video is shaping up nicely. It's going to be a "day in the life" video. I have to go buy a vibrator. Oops! Did I type that aloud? It will hopefully be done before I go to LA so I can show it there. I'm very nervous. I usually hate myself on video. Film is OK but video is so raw.

In LA I'm going to meet up with the executives of Peach DVD and three of their actresses. It should be a good interview. If You've never seen a Peach DVD movie I suggest you check one out. They have really hot girls stripping all over the place.

Chicago has been nice the past few days. Yesterday the temperature was in the 70's. Today it's starting to get cold. I've been sleeping in the nude too and I'm not happy about having to put on my nightgown. I will be having a guest soon. He's "helping" out with the movie. We are going to practice a lot. I'm very happy about that. It's been almost a week!

Hardcore picture is going up today. Getting you ready for the video I guess. Since there was no nudity I decided to put two up.

The Ron Jeremy Experience

2007-03-13T09:40:00.000-06:00

I seem to remember writing that I would tell you all about my experience interviewing Ron Jeremy a few posts back. I was going to write a feature about the experience for MrSkin. I will let you know when that goes up. It should be a fun feature to read and I hope MrSkin will want to publish it.

All that you hear about Ron Jeremy is true, he's an amazingly nice man. He was a complete gentleman with me all night. We had a lot in common and a great time together. It was his birthday yesterday. I've been meaning to call him because he gave me a number for someone at Hustler and I want to hear from him again that he thinks I can be in the magazine. He also took a few of my photos which is flattering. This man who has been with over 4000 women thought I was hot. That really means a lot to me. It gave me the confidence boost I needed a day after I got fired from my job.

We met at a dance club right outside of Chicago. He wasn't there when I got there so I had to wait for him. There was a $20 cover and I wasn't about to pay it when I was invited! Was that last sentence a little snotty? I'd better watch myself I don't want to get too full of myself even if Ron Jeremy did think I was hot (did I mention that he's been with 4000 women and thought I had something special?)

When he arrived at the club I walked up to him and introduced myself. He immediately pulled my right breast out and squeezed it. "Nice and real, I like your tits". He then signed my boob and put it back in my bra. I was so flattered.

We were brought to a small area by the bar that served as the VIP area and people came up to him and told him how much they loved him while he signed tits and pictures. He then sang his rap song and MC'd an orgasm contest. This cute little blond won. I sat in the VIP area the whole time. All I heard during the contest was a bunch of screaming. It was fun to tell guys who came up and asked me to dance or if I wanted a drink, that I was with Ron Jeremy. A few hung around to see if I was lying and when he came back he gave me a big hug and kiss. The guys got his autograph and slinked away knowing that they had no way of getting near my pussy that night.

By the time we left Ron had about 2 hours to get to the airport so I agreed to drive him and his manager Mike back to the hotel then to the airport. We conducted the interview then-well while he wasn't sleeping in my front seat. Oh and thank you Bob for letting me borrow your car. (I do have some of the best friends in the world.) Bob was so excited when I told him Ron Jeremy sat in his car.

There will be more detail in the feature but I wanted to give you a quick recap. I had a really great time and am really a lucky girl.

We Could Be Naked Price List

2007-03-13T00:07:00.000-06:00

Here is that price list I promised you:

Photos:
Regular shots (I like to call them glamor shots)---5x7" $5.00, 8x10" $10
Pussy Shots (close ups and spreading shots)---5x7" $7, 8x10" $15
Hard core (insertion shots)---5x7" $10, 8x10" $20

I sign all the photos I send. if you order more than one I will only sign one unless you ask for more to be signed. I will do requests too just email me.
Electronic photos are also available. Prices are negotiable on those and depend on subject matter.

Calendars are $30 to $50. They are hand made and take me about 4 hours each to make. I love to do them so please ask me about them.

The video will be available after my LA trip and not priced yet.

Showgirls part two

2007-03-12T14:11:00.000-06:00

I did get to sleep after the post last night. I was asleep as soon as my head hit the pillow.

I think it's 60 degrees out more outside right now! I rode my bike for a little bit earlier and feel great. I love riding my bike, it's the only real exercise I get. If you noticed from the picture last night I was a little more tan than I have been. I'm trying my best to get as tan as possible for the video shoot this weekend. This weather makes it that much easier for me to go to the tanning salon.

I think the most fun I had on Saturday was dancing with the winners of the trivia contest. I think out of 5 or 6 questions only one guy won. Girls rule and I was so turned on by the amount of girls that were there and how much they knew about Showgirls. Each winner got a MrSkin t-shirt and my boobs rubbed on them. The final question which the EP was sure no one would guess was for a lifetime subscription to MrSkin.com. The question was which actress was in both Showgirls and Striptease? There was more to the question but I forgot cause I knew the answer. The EP likes to spout out little trivia facts when we watch movies together or just because. He's not showing off he really thinks it's cool and it is. The answer is Rena Riffel and one lucky chick in the audience said the actress that played Penny. It surprised us all, I'm not sure if she said her real name but MrSkin is generous and impressed so the lucky chick got the prize and to dance with me for a few seconds-very cute girl.

I can't remember exactly when but I believe when MrSkin was talking about how many boobs were in the movie which is 46 (8 butt cracks and 4 muffs), I pulled my top down an shook my boobs for a few seconds. Then I think my nipple was hanging out for the rest on the presentation, at least I hope it was.

I had a good time and MrSkin and the EP were really happy with both me and Lil Princess. However, I didn't stay for the whole movie. I was tired and spent all day fighting with my sewing machine. I wanted to go home and go to bed. That meant missing out on maybe grabbing a chick to go home with and I'm regretting it. It's been a while since I had a girl. Also, I'm sorry but I can not afford to put a chick in the video. It's my first and I can barely pay for it so I need to see if I can make some money off it. If I do I will definitely put a chick in the next one.

The music box is the first of many MrSkin appearances where he will be presenting a movie or endorsing a product. I may be involved. The next one is for the baseball season opener--I'm not sure for which team (I'm very sports illiterate but I do enjoy learning about it with an expert-naked). I'll be in LA and unable to go half dressed to a baseball game. It sounds like a lot of fun but LA will be much more fun.

Speaking of my trip, last year when I went to LA to interview Christy Canyon I asked for donations and many of you were more than happy to help. I'm doing it again. I already paid for the plane tickets but I need to rent a car, get a hotel room and eat while I'm out there. It looked so much easier when I was employed but all that has changed now. So if any of you are feeling generous, please share with me. There are two buttons for donations on this page. One is on the right panel and the other is on the bottom of the blog. It's true donations get me naked but so does everything else. You make a donation through my paypal account which I can transfer into my bank account. Those of you familiar know how it works. If you don't feel comfortable with that please feel free to email me (alixxx13@gmail.com)and I will send you an address to send a check or money order. I prefer paypal but whatever you feel most comfortable with is fine. The address you will be getting is not my own.

You can also order pictures. I know it takes a long time to get them. I'm really working on it. I used to work right next to the Post Office but now it's two buses away. I also order them through an online service and that take a few days too. Please be patient. My next post will be a pricing post and you will be able to click on a link on the right side of this blog to see it every time you need to.

Showgirl insomniac

2007-03-12T02:28:00.000-06:00

It's 3am and I can't sleep but after I finish this I'm forcing myself to. My sewing machine broke in the middle of sewing my costume so I had to finish it by hand. The top is completely sewn by hand and happens to look really good. The skirt is the left over fabric after I made the first one---by hand. I hated how it looked and it was getting late so I just took the rest of the fabric and tied it around my waist. There is a picture of Mr Skin, Lil Princess and me together but Mr Skin has his eyes closed so I will wait for the other photographer to send those pictures. Next time I do this hopefully the EP will give me more time so I can give you more notice. I did take my top off and I would have loved to have all of you that are here in Chicago in the audience. What was surprising was the large amount of women in the audience who loved us! They were there for the movie but so many of them told us how much they loved us. Wow, more girls for me!

Busy Naked Girl

2007-03-09T18:59:00.000-06:00

I have been busy, busy, busy! Since getting laid off I have been working non stop! Friday I renewed my drivers license and missed 5 questions on the test! I'm losing it, the last time I didn't miss any. I passed. You are allowed to miss 7. I took a good picture.

Before I go into my week recap. I did update the Road to Christy Canyon blog with the full transcription of the interview form last October. It is very long but I wanted you to read all of the interview because it's so much fun to read. I will also be selling the audio if I can find it. I'm buying a DVD burner this weekend so I will be able to copy it and I want my money for the burner back.

Friday night I had the Ron Jeremy interview which I will talk about in the next post. Ron was a complete gentleman and we had a lot of fun together at Energy Night Club. Meeting and Interviewing Ron Jeremy was almost as good as meeting Christy Canyon. He really wanted to help me do my best and I got some awesome material! I will say that the first thing he did when I introduced my self was pull out my tit squeeze it tell me they were great and sign it. Here's a picture after I got home.

Saturday, I spent the day writing interviews trying to catch up. Saturday night I had a going away party to attend. My best friend is moving a few hours away and I'm going to really miss her. I showed up late and many were already drunk. I only knew a few people. I like to brag and I had just interviewed Ron Jeremy so I wanted to show people the pictures of me and him. One of my friends who I hadn't seen in a while was there. We'll call him Ryan. He was one of my favorite people and I was always happy when he showed up at a party. I showed him the picture which was sandwiched between two boob pics. I told him to be careful that he might see tit. he then snottily remarked "yeah, who hasn't see your tits?" It's true but I never figured that a friend would be so snotty. I must have pissed off quite a few of my friends when I started this blog and posing nude. I notice it when I get teased by them like that I must fuck everyone I interview or meet through this. I'm not surprised but is is annoying and it hurts when it comes from people you count on to support you. Even if I do, what does it matter? It's adds to the many reasons why I write this blog and post my pictures. Sex needs to stop being so bad. Having a lot of it with many different people isn't a bad thing as long as you use protection and are careful. But I guess my friends don't agree or they think it's funny to try to embarrass me. I don't really like going to parties anymore because of it. And I know now why I don't hear from them as much.

Sunday was all work and no play. I went tanning and burned a little. I need to work on my tan for the upcoming photo shoot on Thursday the 15th and the video shoot on the 17th and 18th. That's right new pictures are coming next week. And I am doing the video. Lot's of stripping and yes sex! Yea!!!I always wanted to do a sex video just for myself and my lover. But now I think you would enjoy it too. I have to talk to the money people and find out how much this is going to cost and then I will know how much to charge. I was just going to call the video We Could Be Naked but I am open to suggestions. So leave your suggestions in the comment section of this blog. Remember you don't have to be a member to leave comments, but I will not post anything negative. Negativity has no place here. So don't bother. And I can look you up through your IP address. Isn't technology great?

Monday I woke up and checked my blog stats. I had something like 1500 hits by 7am. Holy shit. The day before I had 2200. i check to see who were my referrers and I saw that Drunken Stepfather linked to me. This is the post with my link I am about halfway down the links and the title is Weird Naked Blog Where The Girl Who Writes It Posts Naked Pics of Herself. Then Ernie's House of Whoop Ass picked it up. You have to scroll down to the March 5th entry to see my picture which links to the site. By the end of the day I had 7741 hits on Monday. This has steadily gone down but it's always nice to see that. I got a ton of new subscribers and am really confident now that my video will sell. So far in on month my site has has 44,285 visits and 26,161 have been unique visits. Its really amazing.

Speaking of subscribers. Please subscribe to this blog. I will send out a news letter and one full sized picture a week to subscribers. The link is on the right side under the About Me link that says Subscribe to Naked. Enter your email and follow the instructions. It should only take about five minutes. If you do not get a newsletter every Friday please let me know. If you didn't get the newsletter today please let me know.

Tuesday I went to Unemployment or I should say Hell. There was barely anybody working and no one was at the info desk. So I grabbed the forms that said "laid off" and filled them out. I went up to the main desk and asked where they went and they said did you take a number? No I did not take a number because no one was there to tell me to take a fucking number. So I was behind everyone who got there after me and were instructed by the information clerk that magically appeared while I was filling out my form.

While I waited I read Rachel Kramer Bussel's new book Caught Looking which is all about voyeurism and exhibitionists. Did I happen to mention that I love reading pornography and erotica in public? I want people to see what I am reading and get turned on by it. I get turned on by the though of that. As I was just getting to the part in the first story when Tammy opens her drapes and takes her clothes off and sits in a chair right in front of the window and sticks a dildo in her pussy and a vibrator on her clit, this very unfortunate looking man interrupts me and asks what I am doing there. I told him I wanted to file for unemployment (what is everyone on crack here why the fuck else would I be there?) He then asked if I had registered on the computer and watched the video. So I went over to the computer and basically answered the same questions that were on the forms I filled out. Waste of paper city of Chicago! Then I had to fill out a skills assessment. It was like registering and putting your resume on Monster or Hot Jobs. It took like 20 minutes because there were a bunch of skill related questions-about 100 of them. It was a nightmare. When I finally finished I went to the video area and it wasn't on. I didn't know how to turn it on so I went back and put my number back in the in box. The same ugly man came up to me and asked if I had finished the computer and I said yes then he asked about the video and I said well it wasn't on and I don't know how to work that stuff. I wanted to skip it he said that if I didn't watch it I wouldn't know what was going on so I went over to the TV and watched the 20 minute video--apparently made by a very mean person that wanted people to fall asleep. I decided to make the most of my time and went to the washroom, wasting about 4 minutes. Then I wrote a list of things I needed to do and came up with questions for Rachel Kramer Bussel who I was interviewing on Wednesday. I also wrote questions for Monique Dupree and Debbie Rochon (when I talked to Debbie Lloyd Kaufman was there and it was more of a Lloyd Kaufman interview and I had a few more questions for Debbie). After the video I put my number back in the box and sat down. A few minutes later they called my name and the guy asked me if I did the computer registration and watch the video. I said yes and he said, "really?" Instead of spitting on him I said "yes I did!" He then said ok you'll get a letter in the mail in a few days. And that was it. He didn't check to see if I had filled the forms out correctly, he didn't check to see if I had done the computer registration correctly and he didn't explain anything further. I asked if I was done and could I go and he said yes. What a fuckin' nightmare!

After unemployment I went to the Skin offices to pick up a few porn DVDs and some soft core DVD's by Peach DVD, a company I will be doing a feature and interview on when I go to LA. I'm barely going to have any fun in LA! That's OK work is fun for me and being with April Flores will be a dream. I better get fucked when I'm there though! It's required! Mike then informed me that I would be appearing with MrSkin at the Music Box Theater on Saturday for the MrSkin presentation of Showgirls. I provided all the info in the previous post. If you are in Chicago I encourage you to come. We will be at the bar across the street for a few drinks before the show I will probably show up at the bar between 9:30 and 10. I'll find out which bar and post it tomorrow. Then it's off to the theater at 11pm. There will be some kind of contest and t-shirt and bumper sticker give-aways. It should be fun and my costume will be made by me and will be falling off occasionally. I sent out a Myspace Bulletin, Blog and invite. If I missed you in the invite please forgive me I had to had select every one of my friends and it took such a long time I kept getting interrupted by the phone and email. Please come, I really want to see you and I will have pictures for you.

Wednesday, I got a script from Jeremy of WormFilms for a great nude scene in his film! Its an awesome script and very bloody and naked! I can't wait! More info on that later.

Thursday, I was invited to Flashback Weekend on July 20th-22nd to be part of the Troma team. Of course I said yes! I has so much fun with Ron and Cathy that I have to go back and have some more. So plan on coming to see me there too. I have to figure out a Tromette name. Most end in ia like Dyslexia, Chlamydia etc which both sound yucky. They also said I could just go as Ms Skin like I did at Fangoria.

And now we are at the present. It's like 60 degrees outside and I have the windows open. The air smells so good. I hear next weekend is going to be 40 degrees which sucks because I was planning on rollerskating nude on a rooftop. Well at least I will have very hard nipples. Harder than these.

Have a great weekend by coming to my show on Saturday!

This Saturday--Half Dressed

2007-03-09T00:52:00.000-06:00

I just found out that on Saturday night/Sunday morning MrSkin is presenting the nude epic of Showgirls! I was asked to dress in a barely there showgirl outfit and give out prizes. I bought some gold sparkle fabric and am making a skirt slit up to there and a top that will hopefully fall off a lot. If you live in Chicago I encourage up you to come to the Music Box and see me and the movie.

Fangoria Day 2!

2007-03-07T12:32:00.000-06:00

I've written this twice and I keep losing it. My computer keeps fucking up and I lose a ton of writing. I'm getting so frustrated. So for the third and hopefully last time here goes....

I woke up late on Sunday. Late for me is 9am. It looked like there was a blizzard outside. It's just like my birthday every year...it snows. I put on black g-string, black bra, mandatory fishnet stockings, suede skirt, low cut top, and knee high boots. I was ready to go.

My first stop was Kinko's. I needed more photos for my book. I didn't go to Fangoria to sell myself. I wanted to get interviews. But Lloyd Kaufman, after seeing my photos was very interested. He asked me to sit at the table and sell my photos. He also said he wanted to talk to me in the future about doing a film for Troma. It was not my idea but I am open to any opportunity and the thought of doing a film thrills me. I was also approached by several producers and actors who asked me for a photo and contact info. Some have already contacted me. It is very flattering.

The blushing Kinko's clerk printed 16 photos and I placed them in a leather bound book in the cab ride to the show.

When I walked into the room where the Troma table was located I was greeted with applause and "Whoo Hoo! Ms. Skin is here! Whoo Hoo!" It was awesome. I had so much fun with everyone at the Troma table. They are all volunteers and I can see why. They love doing the conventions for Troma. One big happy family led by Ron and Cathy MacKay gets together from different parts of the country and have one huge Troma Party weekend!

The first person I wanted to see was Debbie Rochon. I spotted her upstairs and gave her the skirt I made. She thanked me with a kiss and hug. She then said she was excited to have me on the radio show on Sirrus that she hosted with Dee Schneider. Hopefully soon I will be in New York . Get ready New Yorkers, especially Chawkc and Danger.

I then wanted to see Ken Foree. I went over to his table and he was with someone and taking pictures. One thing I noticed about Ken Foree was that he seemed to be having the time of his life. He had a huge grin on his face and was laughing. I approached him and was amazed how tall he was. He is also very handsome and I'm sure I was blushing. I could tell he liked me but he said he wasn't doing interviews and if he gave me an interview than that wouldn't be fair to everyone that he turned down. Slut that I am, I handed him my book. His eyes grew wide as he flipped through it and picked out one that he liked. We posed for two pictures and he kept saying something like "Girl you've got really fine...you know mmm hmmm...baby!" He squeezed me real tight during one of the photos and a I got really wet and I'm glad I was wearing a g-string or else it would have trickled down my leg.

Next person I saw was Ari Lehman. What a fun guy. He was the first Jason and agreed to an interview over email. He also took a few pictures with me and a scary mask. I want to hang out with this guy. He lives somewhere in the Chicago land area so that may be a possibility. Ari Lehman was very nice and I am looking forward to doing the interview with him.

I missed Kane Hodder who played Jason in Friday the 13th VII, VIII and IX. But I did meet him the day before and he was cute although eerie. Bill Mosley was on his way out and seemed so busy so I just said hi.

When I got back to the Troma Table Monique Dupree was there and I creamed my g-string again! Talk about hot! She made the whole room go up about 10 degrees. We posed for a picture and I enjoyed feeling her breasts brush up against mine. I am about to email her questions today as soon as I get this post done. If I ever get it done. So far so good, but I keep saving it every paragraph which is a pain in the ass.

After a long day that was so much fun, I wasn't ready for it to end. After all it was my birthday. So I picked one lucky guy out of the crowd and asked him if he would take some pictures of me. One of my friends, McSkyy, writes these really fun stories about chicks getting caught naked. He asked me to take a few pictures for him naked and embarrassed. Here's my chance to get some classic locked out of the hotel room naked photos. Me and Mr. Lucky had lots of fun snapping pics of me in the hotel hallway and a few of me "caught" in the shower.

Since I was already naked...well what else was there to do. Aside from Lucky being adorable he had a huge uncircumcised cock! I loved sucking on it! It was so nice having it in my mouth all that flesh. Obviously, I have never had an uncircumcised cock before so it was like a brand new toy for me. I pulled back the foreskin sucked it, licked it, nibbled it and sucked his balls. It was so much fun. I want more uncircumcised cocks!

He gave me head that I didn't know 21 year-olds knew how to do! I certainly never got head like that when I was 21 by any of my 21 year-old guys. The orgasm I had while his tongue swirled around my clit was unbelievable. I grabbed him and he rammed into me and the size of him surprised me. He filled me up to the top! Fucking, fucking, fucking me, Lucky made me lucky! As soon as I came on my back he flipped me over an fucked me doggie style and I came two times more. Expert that he was, when he got close he just pulled out and licked my cunt and ass until I came again and he was ready. He finished by giving me a facial. I do do those, yes. He was careful not to get any in my eyes which was a feat cause quite a load came out of his penis. I took the last spurts in my mouth and wiped the semen off my face and licked my fingers clean.

I could barely walk afterwards. He half carried me to the cab an hour later. He gave me a long wet kiss that promised he'd be back for more and I tumbled into the cab and fell asleep for the long ride home.

Happy Fucking Birthday Alix!!!!!

PS: I'm including one nude pic of me that is part of the series when I copied Christy Canyon's 1985 Hustler spread.

Fangoria pictures

2007-03-04T12:26:00.000-06:00

To fulfill my promise of providing pictures from Fangoria I am writing this post before I write about my experience with Ron Jeremy. Sorry I took a little longer than I promised. I think I had a really good excuse.

On Saturday February 24th, I got a ride with the EP to the convention. Lil Princess was also with us. It was cold and snowy-typical for Chicago in February. I wore my pinstripe pleated skirt, white top, black bra, fishnet stockings and 7 inch t-strap heels. I looked good and sexy.

When we go to the convention it was packed. The line to get in wrapped around the lobby and there was over an hour wait. Immediately, Lil Princess and I got on the phone. Lil Princess was able to get in touch with Kevin who made the documentary for Vampira. Kevin saved the day because he told Lloyd Kaufman I was there and then next thing I know I am being guided past the line into he convention on the arm of Lloyd Kaufman himself. We were stopped a few times and here is a shot of me Lloyd and famed photographer Niva Bringas. Niva is the photo editor of Midwest Beat, a music magazine. Niva also manages Michael McDermott and takes pictures of some gorgeous women. I hope to work with him soon.

Lloyd introduced me to everyone at the Troma table then grabbed Debbie Rochon and the three of us headed up to his room. I was able to interview both Debbie and Lloyd at the same time! the interview should be up soon I will let you know when that will be. Both were very impressed with my pictures and took a few. I love it when my interview subjects want my pictures.

Debbie is a doll and took her top off for photos with me and Lloyd. I got to touch Debbie Rochon's boobies! She is a truly beautiful woman.

Love my cheesy grin?

Lloyd is married so like the good husband that he is he kept his hands off but still wanted to get in on the fun.

We then went back down to the Troma table and Lloyd asked me to stay at the table all day and the next to be an honorary Troma girl. He told me to sell my pictures too if I wanted, which I did! It was such an honor. He is such an awesome human being! I hope to work with him soon.

Ron and Kathy MacKay run the Troma booth at the conventions. Such a fun couple! I loved hanging out with them. Also there was an adorable guy named Steve and another cutie named Jeremy. Jeremy makes movies and you can see more info on Myspace about his company Evil Worm Productions. I hope to make a film with him soon.

I spent the rest of the day hanging out with the Troma people. I sold a few shots and walked around with Steve meeting people and trying to get interviews. At the end of the day I went home very happy and I couldn't wait to go back.

When I got home I decided to make Debbie a skirt too. It was the least I could do since she was so great. I had my work cut out for me. I stayed up until 3am and this is what I came up with:

I really hoped Debbie would be happy with my work. I was finished at 3am and I went to bed excited to go back to Fangoria!

life threw me a big one!

2007-03-01T19:29:00.000-06:00

I went into work today feeling a little better but more afraid of losing my job than getting sicker. I took a permanent position so I could have health benefits, paid vacation and sick time and a 401K. I like my job there is little to no stress and I can work on the blog and correspond with you guys because lets face it Whitehall is in the middle ages when it comes to technology and monitoring what their employees are looking at on the computer. Since I have extremely smart friends like Danger, I have cleaners that will erase all my internet files and pretty much clean up any accidental porn I come across when I am browsing the internet at work.

All that changed today at 12pm when I was called into my bosses office to be told that they were changing my position and they wanted someone with a more financial analyst background. I was offered a modest severance equal to one paycheck and would be paid until the end of the day today even though I left at noon. I am going to ask for my vacation pay and to be paid for Friday. I think that is fair. I have no spouse to help me and I've been paying off debts so I really have no savings. I think it's the least they can do since I'm the only admin who is single and needed the job probably the most out of all of them. In fact they just hired an admin who wasn't getting benefits yet and wouldn't have been as expensive to fire. Despite the fact that they said it had nothing to do with my performance I still hate their guts and hope they rot in hell!

But lets look at the bright side shall we? I had a fabulous birthday at Fangoria getting so many interviews and making so many hot new friends that I'm still smiling. I'm meeting the King of Porn Ron Jeremy tomorrow night and hanging out with him at a swanky club for his book launching party here in Chicago, I was invited to be on Debbie Rochon and Dee Schneider's radio show in New York. Lloyd Kaufman wants me to submit pictures to become a Tromette of the month and maybe be in a Troma movie. I'm going to LA to meet up with the incomparable and beautiful April Flores and take sexy pictures with her. I will also meet the adorably hot Porn Hater who happens to be my crush of 2007 and my favorite blogger of the moment. I'm meeting up with Christy Canyon again to be on her Playboy radio show with Ginger Lynn, Night Calls. Christy emailed me the other day and I pulled my vibrator out I was so excited. I'm very happy about all of this.

The EP as usual is my biggest supporter and he promises to send me all the work he can. I'm really one lucky girl to be in his top ten. He'll always be a saint to me.

Also, I can write more. So this could be a blessing in disguise. Still, I'm losing a big chunk of my income and it's a bit scary. So this time I'm not going to be cute when I ask for money. I really do need it now. Buy my photos. And if you are really feeling generous but me a web cam and you can watch me live for a fee. Of course the web cam buyer will get a few free views. I'm also going to make a video and selling it so I will take suggestions on the content of the video. I'm not promising anything but I'm sure you wont be disappointed.

It's also forcing me to look at my life and where I want to go from here. I'm definitely thinking about moving to LA or Vegas. LA would be best but it's very expensive. Vegas would be cheaper and I wouldn't be far from LA. I don't know. I'd love to hear what you think.

I'm also probably not going to take another permanent position again. I'll temp for a while but I don't think that working for a corporation is for me. I'm happiest working for myself. I'm sure many people think I'm crazy for doing all this nudity for free. But I have absolute control over what people see and how I am advertised. I control all my shoots and what I write. It's awesome. I get to let you see exactly what I want you to see.

I hope that didn't sound too desperate. I'm really happy about not having to go to work every day and having more time to devote to my writing, interviews and blogs. Don't feel bad for me feel happy that you will see more of me and know that I truly very happy despite this small set back.

You will be seeing much more of me so enjoy!

Got Milk?

2007-02-28T08:05:00.000-06:00

This is the way the ads should look for milk.
I've been sick a total of 2 times within a year. I have the flu now and I had strep throat during Thanksgiving. I haven't been this sick since I was a little girl. I remember calling in sick when I was too hungover to go to work it was bad but not as bad as this. I couldn't do anything yesterday and I have that Sugasm post up so I need to get something up because I'm sure you are bored by all that erotic writing. But I do need to rest so I can get better. Hopefully I'll be back tomorrow. See you soon.

I'm on Sugasm #67

2007-02-25T11:50:00.000-06:00

Close to the bottom but there none the less.

Sugasm #67

Fri 23rd Feb, 07

The best of this weeks blogs by the bloggers who blog them. Highlighting the top 3 posts as chosen by Sugasm participants. Want in Sugasm #68? Submit a link to your best post of the week using this form. Participants, repost the linklist within a week and you’re all set.

This Week’s Picks
First Orgasm (http://deliciously-naughty.typepad.com)
“His thumbs begin to stroke my nipples, and I watched my breath, coming out in little puffs of air, quicken.”

It’s in the Genes (http://www.sex-kitten.net/home.html)
“I found old magazines disguised as photography and drawing magazines but were actually full of nude women and some men […]”

Why You Should Never Sit on Hotel Bedspreads (http://brooklynrake.blogspot.com)
“We are looking for someone who can get a bit rough. Is that you?”

Mr. Sugasm Himself
Why Porn’s Already Decided the Next Generation Video Format (http://sugarbank.com)

Editor’s Choice
Take Your Sick Fantasies to the Shrink (http://adelehaze.com)

More Sugasm
Join the Sugasm

Erotic Writing and Experiences
The Beginning (http://thebridgeofshame.blogspot.com)
Birthday Wishes (http://loladavid.wordpress.com)
The Black Widow - Erotic Poetry (http://eroticjournals.blogspot.com)
Correction: Instructive Desire (http://lumpesse.com)
Eclectic Slut part two (http://junohenry.wordpress.com)
Fair Play - Part I (http://lafillemariee.blogspot.com)
Hot and heavy (http://marriedexploits.blogspot.com)
A La Carte (http://confessions112.blogspot.com)
The Lilith Quotient, Part The First (http://udoj.wordpress.com)
More Interruptions (http://gentlygently.blogspot.com)
My Girlfriend the Stripper, part 4 (http://erotischism.blogspot.com)
The Sex Competition! (http://mandyseroticlife.blogspot.com

Sex & Politics
The Cop vs. The Stripper (http://www.radicalvixen.com/blog)
Morning After Malarky (http://www.jessicagoldharalson.com)

BDSM & Fetish
Escape into Darkness (http://blog.myspace.com/tit_elation)
The Golden Question (http://www.neongolden.com)
In Search of the Inner Lesbian (http://sweatshopsissy.wordpress.com)
Story: A Mystic Meeting (http://acestrokes.blogspot.com)

Sex News, Reviews and Interviews
Silicone Taffy Tickler Water Buddy Vibrator Review (http://stilettodiaries.blogspot.com)

NSFW Pics (& videos)
Happy HNT - Valentine’s thumbcuffs (http://darkside-journey.blogspot.com)
Lady Dalbin - On the Waterfront Part One (http://thebootcam.com)

Sexy Humor
Secret Reads: Skippy The Fluffy Fucker II (http://secretbrain.blogspot.com)
Uniform Fetish (http://spankingwriters.com/blog)
What If? Part 1 (http://principalquattrano.com/blog)

Sex Work
Danni’s pics and his crush on danika! (http://www.princessmorgan.net)

Thoughts on Sex and Relationships
10 Reasons to Masturbate (as if you needed any) (http://edinerotica.blogspot.com)
I Got Some Amazing Comments (http://wecouldbenaked.blogspot.com)
Of Floggers and Fire Escapes (http://talktovanessa.com)
Selfish (http://perverselypoly.blogspot.com)

Sex Blogging/Sex Writing
The Affair (http://blog.myspace.com/deannadahlsad)
The POD Stigma (Or Scratching the Self-Published Itch) (http://www.writingup.com/blog/dark_blue)

Thumbcuffs courtesy of Journey to the Darkside.

Troma Girl!!

2007-02-25T03:16:00.000-06:00

Fangoria was a ton of fun today. I got to sit down with Lloyd Kaufman, Debbie Rochon, Jen Tonan, Ron, Kathy, Steve, Jeremy and all the Tromettes at the Troma booth! It was so much fun that I'm going back for more tomorrow. I'm going to interview Kane Hodder who played Jason from Friday the 13th a bunch of times and Ken Foree from Dawn of the Dead and other movies (I'm tired look it up). Both these interviews are subject to the guys' availability so I plan on spending the whole day at the convention. It was tiring but so much fun. I even sold a few pictures!

I promise to have some nice pictures either tomorrow or Monday. Yes, I took my top off and convinced Debbie Rochon to do the same!

Stay tuned. it's time for me to get some rest.

Oh and Happy Birthday to me! I'm older today!

Beautiful Flowers

2007-02-23T20:13:00.000-06:00

I came home today to absolutely the most beautiful flowers. Thank you Chaw! Chaw got it right, Iris' and Lilies! Two flowers that I love. It's my birthday on Sunday. What a nice way to start my birthday weekend. I'm getting older Sunday and I'm not too happy about it. But it is the one time of year I like to devote to me. I'm not like those people who humbly say "oh it's just another day..." It is just another day but I like that it's my day. I like hearing happy birthday. I like getting gifts. And to start it all off here's a gift to you, a nice picture for those of you who like me without the wig.

Good news! I just bought my plane tickets to LA. This time I'm going straight to LA and not to Vegas first. I have too many people to see in LA to go to Vegas first. I will be doing a photo shoot with April Flores shot by her husband Carlos Batts that should be sexy as hell! The EP wants us to make out so we'll see. I'm also going to go to the Playboy Studios to be on the radio with Christy. So like last year, I am going to start asking for donations. Good thing this time is that I have pictures to give you if you do make a donation. So donate away and make my trip to LA fun and filled with sexy nakedness!

Fangoria!

2007-02-23T08:51:00.000-06:00

Tonight is the beginning of Fangoria. I won't be going until tomorrow. I have a ride tomorrow but not Sunday. Not having a car makes it difficult so I have to figure out the bus system if I decide to go on Sunday. There is a train that goes to Ohare but no to the Wyndham. I hope some of you are planning in going if you are in Chicago. I will have photos with me but it's not about me so I will not be advertising them. If you see me and you want one please ask.

Lloyd Kaufman and Debbie Rochon are going to be a hoot to interview! I also want to meet Shawnee Smith who I've had a crush on since Not My Kid which I think was an after school special. But I could be wrong. I remember because she was so pretty I wanted to be a drug addict just like her. Funny how your mind works when you are younger.

I also will be standing in line to meet Ken Foree the star of Dawn of the Dead, From Beyond and The Devil's Rejects! There's also Bill Mosley, Doug Bradley (I've had fantasies of fucking Pinhead), Kevin Michaels, Gunnar Hansen, and--oh, trying to name everyone I want to meet is stupid. I'm just going to have a blast.

I have to find something to wear. Going naked would be ideal but it is illegal. Any suggestions?

Have fun with this picture. I loved this photo shoot!

Titty fucking and footnotes

2007-02-19T01:49:00.000-06:00

This may be a hardcore picture. I have no idea. I know my mother would flip and say "Oh Alix! That's disgusting!" No, she never called me Alexandra when she was mad. That is one of the things that is great about my mom. Like her I don't call my boyfriends by their full names when they are being bad unless they are known by their full names. I also don't call people by their cutesy nicknames. My sister has a nickname that just doesn't roll off my tongue easily so I call her by her real name. It's a beautiful name. My mother did a good job naming us. Therefore, I hate being called Al, Ali, Alexis, Lexi, or anything else derived from Alix. For a short period of time I was known as Zoe. That was college and I tried everything in college. I like my name so I went back to it. It wasn't my idea this Zoe fake-name. My roommate had a fake name and gave me this whole spiel about re-inventing ourselves. I went along with it even though I was totally annoyed with her. I was 18 I didn't know what the fuck I was doing.

By the way anybody who thinks they know what they are doing at 18 is stupid and annoying. I sound like Stepfather*. I'm not trying to hate, I'm just trying to make you understand that I finally know now that I didn't know everything and will never know everything. And that's not a bad thing like I thought, it's really good cause I want to spend my life finding stuff out. It's so much fun! Like this blog for instance. I know this will sound like bullshit but I really didn't think I was hot. I knew I was pretty but hot? No I thought I was too cute to be hot. But I spend 99% of my time flirting and trying to be sexy. Ok 97% I don't do that at work ALL the time. So when I post pictures and get good feedback I feel really hot.

And I also realize that when I was 18 and thought porn was bad and naked was bad, I was wrong. I really like getting naked and taking pictures of it. When I look at myself I think about how I get fucked. Naked, my body looks like it's ready for sex and I usually am. I know what my skin feels like and I like putting it out there for people to see and want to know what it feels like. I'm not always ready, like now I feel crappy. I'm editing my Holly Does Hollywood** blog and am having a hard time cause I don't feel like writing about sex. Funny that I am writing about sex now but this is different. I'm not so much turned on as I am thoughtful.

I guess I'm an exhibitionist. I fantasize about people looking at me. I have since I was very young. I like the idea of a peeping Tom watching me masturbate. When Julie said she never gets to see me masturbate I tried to imagine her watching me. We are so goofy together I'm sure we would just giggle the whole time. The first time I masturbated with a girl we just giggled as we passed the vibrator back and forth. She wanted me to know how to do it. I thought she was weird and I was embarrassed. I was 18 and stupid. I never thought she wanted to do it with me. I couldn't imagine her wanting to. But she did. We didn't go much father than that. We both came through giggles and were probably unsure if the other faked it or not.

I remember coming on accident. It took me by surprise and I tried my best to hide it and act cool. So I giggled really loud as the currents shuttered through my body. I never felt it that intense. My friend looked a way long enough for me to let my smile curve into an O shape and I squeezed my eyes shut to enjoy it. My giggles became more like halting gasps that I couldn't control. My body shook as I pulled the vibrator off my clit and opened my eyes. My friend was staring at me. I must have turned beet red. She looked at me and asked if I came. I didn't answer. She had just come*** a few minutes before I think. She was oh-ing and giggling with a smile. Her eyes were closed and she rocked back and forth on the vibrator a little. I liked watching her body shutter. I felt like I was invading her privacy. As much as I wanted to remain cool and calm I just kept getting wetter and wetter. We weren't naked. All we had to do was put it on our clits for a minute or two thorough our underwear. Then she said it was Ok if I did cause she did.

We never talked about being lesbians or anything. That's what I was afraid of. I really didn't like her. She was rich and spoiled. She had that North Shore attitude and was on her way to being a SUV driving suburban bitch just like her mom. She would have kids and try to be cool with them through her divorces. This is what I mean by knowing everything at 18. That's how I thought. Now, I wonder if she turned out like I thought she would. I wonder if she would want to play pass the vibrator again. I think I'm more than ready for her now.

*I'm not putting Stepfather down here. Hating is his thing, he's great at it. He's the best hater I know and I love him for it

**I promise the post will be up soon. Please be patient, I'm not feeling well and I have a lot to do this week.

***spelling come with a u doesn't seem appropriate for this innocent memory.

One more before bed

2007-02-19T00:58:00.002-06:00

I really like the shots from this photo shoot. I'm putting one up before I go to bed.

I got about a quarter through a recap of Holly Does Hollywood and I, as usual, fucked myself so hard that I have to take a break. As an apology for not getting it up I hope this picture satisfies you until I can get back to normal.

Thank you Porn Hater!

2007-02-18T17:09:00.000-06:00

I'm finally in Porn Hater! I've been hoping they would pick me up. I go to Porn Hater every day. April Flores turned me on to them. I hope I get to meet whoever is behind this fabulous site when I go to LA. If I knew how to do a screen capture I would show you his site. But I suggest you go there every day like me. It gets my rocks off.

You will have to make do with a couple pictures of me from my new photo shoot with Julie Fab...

Video Blog!!!!!

2007-02-17T22:14:00.000-06:00

Julie and I taped this video blog today it's cute and I'm topless so watch it. If you can't see it here for some reason go here. We took around 160 photos today and I will have them soon. She copied them onto a DVD and it won't play on my computer so I can't save the pictures. I'm not really all that computer literate. I put the thing in my other computer and it got stuck! So I'm going to get a CD from Julie later. So be patient and watch the video.

2007-02-16T09:54:00.000-06:00

This is another one of my favorite pictures. The EP said it was really hot. He was very impressed that he took such a hot picture. This weekend I have a shoot and promise to get more pictures up by at least Sunday night. Maybe sooner. Depends on how much time I have.

I'm making a dress for Lil' Princess this weekend for Fangoria. The director of a new documentary about Vampira contacted her about appearing at Fangoria with him as Vampira. I told her I'd make the dress which should be fairly simple and good practice. I haven't made a sleeve in over a year. So I hope they play Project Runway reruns this weekend. I'd like the relive the first season.

It's Friday! For some reason I'm very horny so I'm going to spend some time in the bathroom fingering myself during lunch. It's not the most romantic place but I have to do something. Women don't ejaculate, well at least I don't on a regular basis, so I really don't have to relieve myself during the day. But I do get all red and hot if I don't. Plus, my boss is leaving early and I can spend a little more time in there. Usually I'm really fast. I swirl my clit around a few times then stick my fingers in my wet and juicy pussy. It's enough for me to give me the sense that I released something. I smell my fingers before I wash my hands. Usually the scent of me lingers all day and so when I get home I'm really horny and ready to go. It's only noon. I can't wait!

2007-02-14T19:02:00.000-06:00

Holy crap! Look who found me!
I checked my tracker and it jumped like 1000! Whoever Fango44 is, thank you. I'm not going to frequent the forum for fear for what people are going to say about me but im flattered that he thinks I'm incredible.

I told you I was going to re-post pictures so here's is one of my favorites. I love this picture. I look so satisfied. Enjoy....

I'm also going to try a new style of blogging. Since I have little time anymore I'm going to try to blog in little spurts. the pictures to words ratio should stay the same. But I will have a lot more entries. Hopefully.

2007-02-11T21:40:00.000-06:00

I did not perform on Friday night. Lil' Princess didn't show up, the bar was too small and the crowd was not the type I felt comfortable stripping in front of.

I decided to wear my wig to the bar. My logic was that if I wore the wig all night and if I decided not to strip, the crowd wouldn't expect it. If I put the wig on right before GITM played, people would expect some type of performance. Everybody looked at me weird but I didn't care. I knew I looked weird and I figured after I took off my clothes they would get it. But there was no room at all for me to do anything. As it was you couldn't walk very easily and I stood right next to the singer of the first band. If I coughed while they were in between songs the mic picked it up! Like I said, it was too small.

The crowd looked as if most people turned 21 two days before except the two moms and one dad standing in the back. Most of the kids looked like they hadn't bathed in about a week and they all shopped at the same store. It was the store that I sold all my late 70's and early 80's sweater vests and corduroy skirts. The moms were the worst though. If it was a bunch of guys like the dad I would have been in my outfit all night. But the moms were another story. Both had suburban mom dos-short mullets. And one kept looking at me and sneering. Now I didn't think my wig looked real! I knew it looked fake and a bit weird, but stop looking and sneering! First off she was wearing jeans and a sweatshirt. I know it was a very dressed down bar, but these women had to have been from Indiana. Sorry if I offend, I don't mean to. In the city life is much different than it is in the country. Indiana people are the easiest to recognize. Anyway, This woman's hair was so greasy it looked wet. I wonder what happened to showering. It's pretty gross. I don't mind if people don't shower for a few days and go to the supermarket. But don't go out to a bar! At least brush your hair if you are allergic to water.

So the show was a bummer but they played great. And my cab ride was free! No I didn't blow him! I gave him free porn. We also pass out porn at the show so I had a few in my bag for me later. He was so grateful that he waved the charge. I also gave him the blog address. But that was it! I don't blow strangers! I will if they are gorgeous and clean. But this guy would have to take me out a few times to earn a BJ.

When I got home I ended up having phone sex with my friend in Miami. He's on a tour and that night they were in Miami. He was really horny which is what happens to him when he parties with the white powder. I guess the girls there weren't as good as me or as me over the phone. Very flattering! I used my bullet again. this time only on my clit. I wanted to cum fast. I don't really like phone sex or cyber sex. It leaves me wanting more. I came twice he came three times. Then I sent him photos over the phone and he came some more. I can't wait till he comes to Chicago. We will have some real fun then. This guy has my favorite cock. It seems like it was made for my mouth. I love sucking on it. I could do it for hours and he lets me. He can cum many times in one sitting. Once, we had sex for 10 hours straight and he came 11 times. It was amazing.

Now I'm horny again and I'm at work. I'll have to go into the last stall again.

I'm running out of pictures so I have to recycle until I can get to my photographer. I promise it will be soon. Hang in there. For the next couple of posts I am going to bring back some of my favorites. This one is a cropped. Remember I sell the rest of these cropped pictures. Some have extreme close-ups and insertion.
You know where to find me and what to do.

If you or anyone you know is a photographer and wants to take pictures of me please get in touch. I want someone who went to school and has a nice camera and lights.

2007-02-09T12:26:00.000-06:00

It's Friday and impossible to work.

I would rather write more about Gays In the Military instead.

Aside from having a perfect name, GITM is really good and a fun band to see. We never really have a plan before the shows. The EP will come up with a few ideas and throw them at us. We take the idea and follow it until the performance takes off. Sometimes this is really successful. At one show for Christmas we had some fat burlesque dancers giving a strap on a blow job and eating cake off each other...

I was dressed as a reindeer with another girl. We were supposed to have a mock sword fight but she was too trashed for me to feel comfortable with the plastic sword. I have gotten a little beat up at the shows before. Not by anyone else just from getting so physical. I had a bruise on my ass for weeks after I fell at the Empty Bottle. The other reindeer just drunk danced topless while guys pawed her and made out with her. She was so lit I don't think she knew what was going on. I'm glad I wasn't her, she could have mysteriously gotten pregnant with all that was happening to her. The next day when we woke up she exclaimed "That was fun!" which we were not expecting. It was a welcome surprise since the audience liked her so much. we expected her to be upset which would have ruined the show for us and her.

When you get wasted, to yourself and other wasted people you look really good. To sober people you look life shit. That's what happened with the fat burlesque dancers. They put on an awesome show I have to admit. I really hate burlesque and fat burlesque makes me scream in agony. But they rocked!

To be continued....

I have to stop the story to talk about what I am wearing tonight.

This very nice oriental couple opened up a beauty shop right by my bus stop. I wasn't going to go in there but I did. Originally I was going to go into the lingerie shop up the street. They had really good bras. But this other one had wigs. I've never worn a wig before and I never thought I wanted to. I have nice hair. And the campyness never appealed to me. I'm very much into natural beauty. I wear makeup in my photos but not a lot. It's obvious sometimes. Sometimes it looks good and others it looks bad.

So I wanted a wig. I'm going outside the box of my natural beauty side. At least I was going to try one on. If it didn't work out there was lots of cheap, trashy lingerie in the shop. So I tried on two wigs and bought them both. I also bought a pink fuzzy teddy. Pink panties, two pairs of black fishnet stockings. One pair has the seam going up the back. Pasties for my nipples-they only had flesh colored and I can always glue some sequins on them later. What else.......cigarettes.

At home I tried on the little pink thing and it's a little small, a slight problem in a bar that won't allow nudity. also a problem was the fishnets are one size fits all. So they are huge which is good for making my legs look smaller. The net of the fishnet shrinks when they are too big which makes the legs look thinner. It's this weird shadow they create and the smaller holes in the net help too. Remember girls (if any read this), big thighs look better in fishnets that have smaller nets. The larger the hole the bigger the thigh. It's easy to remember but really complicated to explain.

Unfortunately for me the little pink panties don't cover up the top of the fishnets. I have to wear tap pants which don't look sexy. I solved the problem by slipping on a sheer black teddy on underneath the pink teddy. I'm still falling out of the top but you can't see the pantie problem and I can wear the pasties. I slipped on my knee high boots and the wig and looked at myself in my mirror and I look really hot. I turned on some Madonna and practiced my best strip dancing moves and felt really good about my outfit and my plan. I also was a little horny and since I haven't used my new bullet......

I put the bullet in my pussy and simultaneously used my other vibrator on my clit. It had to be one of the best orgasms I've ever had and the fastest! I can't do it again. I'm still shaking. My pussy is still incredibly wet! If I didn't have the bullet in my pussy I believe I would have squirted. The scream was a uncontrolled almost growl/ohhhhhhh. I've never been that out of control during sex. This will definitely kill me one day. I mean I'll have a heart attack or something. It was soooooooo good! All I can do is type. So I have two hours to recuperate before the EP comes and picks me up. I need a guy to be able to vibrate. Soon they will have vibrating rubbers and I'll be the first to get them.

I'm still a little nervous because I don't know the club but I think it will be ok. A few drinks will help. I'm bringing my camera and will take pictures. If you happen to be in Chicago and near Cal's on the south side? Oh fuck! It's at 400 S. Wells! If you know Chicago you know why I say fuck! We are playing at midnight and I will only be out for a few minutes so try to be on time.

2007-02-08T18:37:00.000-06:00

I got the confirmation and am meeting with Ron Jeremy when he is here in Chicago. I was sent a message from his manager on myspace. I think its adorable that he has a myspace account but I think he should learn how to use it rather than having his manager do it for him. But he is a busy guy and probably is like one of those people that gets frustrated just looking at a computer. I'm not saying anything about his age. My ex is only 3 years older than me and he gets mad after being on the computer for three minutes. I had to set up his email and he checks it maybe two or three times a month. It's a bit pathetic. When we lived together I basically did what Ron's manager does for him. So I'm not saying Ron's old-just to make that clear. And if you think I'm going to try to see it, yes I will ask to see it. In his book Ron states that he has a "I'll show you mine if you show me yours" policy. Paris Hilton took Ron into the bathroom but I'll do it right in front of everyone at the club. Like I'm going to have a problem with that!

NEXT!

Tomorrow I'm going to be performing with Gays In the Military. The last time I danced for them was at the Skin Summer Soiree. I wore a pink skirt with a camouflage bikini top that was wayyyyy toooooo small. So it fell off a lot, or well, I fell out a lot. It was fun and I have no pictures. I wonder how that happened? Hey EP if you are reading this maybe you should help me out here. Anyway, I guess there is no nudity allowed. I have to somehow cover up my tits. I hate playing new places.

I started dancing for GITM almost two years ago. The EP plays base and when we were dating he asked me to make a few costumes and dance for the band. I wanted to roller skate so he bought me a pair of roller skates. It's kind of blurry but the first time was probably the Skin Summer Soiree in 2005. I tried to roller skate on the roof top of Skin Central with another chick. I wore a skirt I designed after watching the movie Roller Boogie about 20 times. It wasn't the skirt Linda Blair wears in the movie, I copied another one and I'm searching for a picture but I can't find one. It's OK, the skirt wasn't all that great. The good skirt was the one I made for the other chick. I cared more about impressing this girl than I did about looking good myself. Funny, I don't ever talk to her anyway so I did all that work for nothing. Plus, she kept the skirt (bitch! I didn't give it to her! I gave it to the band!) and it was such a complicated pattern that I never got around to making one for myself. The tops were forgettable. My tops are never that good. They always come off so I don't take the time to make them as good as I can.

Unfortunately, there was no chemistry between me and the other skater. She was straighter than a board. And really tall. Being tall has nothing to do with anything but she was soooooo tall. I pulled down my top for the camera. It was so easy and I really didn't feel uncomfortable at all. Mr Skin was happy, the EP was happy and I was happy. When the EP asked me to do it again I laced up my roller skates and took off my top at the Big Horse, Double Door, Empty Bottle and the Mutiny. Falling at the Empty Bottle stopped the skating and started the dancing. I've always been a good dancer. GITM shows were always really outrageous. We used lots of girls. Lil Princess and I were the two staples throughout the span of the GITM shows. Then they broke up or something happened. And the EP and the lead singer formed a DJ duo called Soft as Fuck and a noise band called Sexual Freedom. This post will be way too long if I go into those two ventures.

Tomorrow night or wait, tonight, I will be dancing at Cal's for GITM once again. I don't know exactly how I'm going to do not being able to get topless. Something with a leash on Lil Princess and a thong I guess.

NEXT!

I just received three packages. One contained pictures so open your wallets and buy some shots of me like the one at the bottom of this post. Pussy usually doesn't go on the blog so you have to buy it. Tonight I felt like giving. I have a ton of 5x7s and a few 8x10s all ready to go. I would love to make some calendars. Even though they are late I'll make them 12 months starting with March. Why do you have to start the year in January?

I also got Alpha Blue Archives Teenage Christy Canyon. I loved this collection when I rented it so I bought it. I plan to have fun with it and my new Nefertiti waterproof massaging bullet. This will look nice in my pussy and ass. I promise to take pictures but you have to buy those too.

NEXT!

I will be appearing at a film fest in October called It Came From Lake Michigan. I don't know too much about what will be at the fest other than me teaching my sexual wisdom and useless knowledge of nudity in film but when I do I will update you. If you plan on being in the Chicago area, take a little road trip to the beer capital of the Midwest, Milwaukee and learn why T&A is necessary and good for films. I will also perform demonstrations--yes live nudity!

NEXT!

Like the tan lines? Do you even notice. Enjoy this I don't put these up very often.

2007-02-07T19:21:00.000-06:00

Shit it's already Thursday!! I haven't posted since Monday. Everything feels off. Last night I was watching a re-run of Project Runway that was on arbitrarily and I didn't know why. I panicked! Does this mean a new season is going to start? When were the auditions? Or, does it mean the auditions are coming soon? Where do you find out about auditions? Have I been so completely neck deep in sex blogging that I missed all the hoopla about Project Runway and a new season? And even more, do I want to try out and be part of the reality television world?

After my over-dramatic, near-death experience on the subway last year I wanted to put my mark on this life more meaningful than the pair of period stained underwear that my life was starting to resemble. I thought Project Runway was the direction I was going to go but then a fantasy world meeting with Christy Canyon and a few naked pictures later I'm on my way to becoming a jet setter without a wardrobe. I haven't sewed anything since Christmas. I think before Christmas! I'm glued to this computer. Fortunately, the sewing machine is going to get a workout soon for Fangoria and April.

OMG! there are commercials for Vegetarian kits! They show cute animals being tortured! I really want to be a vegetarian! I thinks cows are really adorable. Why do they have to taste so good? When I was younger I tried to be a vegetarian. I ate noodles, noodles and noodles. I then got really sick and my dad made me a steak and I no longer had a "cause". It's now not a "cause" its a choice like quitting smoking that I really want to make but can't. Oh, the humanity!

Where was I? Should I try out for Project Runway? I'm undecided. I could use the excuse of not wanting to go on television and being at the mercy of the editors. But that doesn't work because I obviously don't care, or, care too much how I am perceived which is evident here on this blog. No the reason is both fear and laziness. I don't want to practice because I'm afraid I won't do well. But, I think I have time. Heidi wants a little time to play with her new baby Seal before another season.

This leaves me time for Ron Jeremy. He was extremely nice on the phone and invited me to see him when he comes to Chicago. So I'm going to wear my lowest cut top and shortest skirt and try to pry more information from him. The book made me laugh off my chair and as very thorough, but I want the whole 10 inches.

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Before I get to the The Hardest (Working) Man in Showbiz, it's off to Fangoria to rub nipples with Elske in hopes that Lloyd Kaufman will give me a better interview than he does the EP. I'm also going to interview the exceptionally beautiful Debbie Rochon. I fell for her sad but sexy lesbian maid in Tromeo and Juliet and have been hoping to get an interview with her ever since!

Then it's off the Vegas and LA where Playboy Radio, April Flores and Viva await me. But first I'm gonna have a little anal in a jacuzzi. Heh-HA!

2007-02-05T07:27:00.000-06:00

I got some amazing comments! As a thank you I will post another gypsy picture. I call these my gypsy pictures because they make me think of Stevie Nicks. I want to dance in slow-mo on a cliff when I wear something this lacy and glittery.

In this picture I look a little surprised so imagine that you surprised me and after the picture was snapped you scooped me up in your arms and led me to a clearing in a forest and ravaged my body! First, make sure you let me dance like a fairy and put flowers in my hair. Then you may fuck the fairy silly!

I bought flowers for my friend today. The reason why is too sad to bring up in this blog. As I look at them (I am holding on to them until she returns home tomorrow for fear that her three cats and two dogs may try to eat them) I can't get over how beautiful they are. I got tulips, my favorite flower. Tulips are simple flowers that hold color beautifully.

I have been given flowers twice in my life. Red roses, given to me by the same guy. Most of my boyfriend's ideas about flowers were "They are dead. Why do you want something dead?" Obviously, I never got them. Regardless of the fact that they are dead they are wonderful to get. Especially a thoughtful bouquet, more than just roses. It's almost a sure fire way to get a good fucking from a woman. I loved getting the roses from my boyfriend but I knew he didn't have the forethought to get me something original and thoughtful. Plus, I'm sure just getting the roses was an activity that he though of as a chore rather than a fun way to show me how much he cared. At least he thought of me enough to spend the money.

I love going to the florist and saying yes to all that they suggest and then watching them skillfully create the bouquet. That's what I want from a man. A well thought out bouquet. He doesn't have to create it just ask the florist what she thinks and ask for a pretty, unique flower to be the focal point. I will definitely shed my clothing and spread my legs for the guy who thinks about the flowers first.

All this flowery talk is making me horny and I need to compile questions for Ron Jeremy, not masturbate (well maybe a little bit-just one orgasm). I don't know if I should try to finish his book tonight or just go with what I know already. I should ask him the obvious questions but I don't want to. It's really neat that he could suck his own cock but it obviously makes him feel uncomfortable. I'm not sure why having your own cock in your mouth is more homo erotic than having your own cock in your hand. It's pretty much the same thing except for the exchange of juices. But it's really sexy for a woman to lick her finger after she sticks it in her twat. But it's gross to have a guy taste his own sperm? It's the fault of what we are taught from a very early age and what I have to fight against every day.

And this picture is OK right? It doesn't make me a lesbian does it?

I could also ask him about the Paris Hilton Bijou Phillips incident. But I hate even thinking about that waste of space. She doesn't even look like a human being anymore with all the work she's had done. I think a while ago someone made the comparison of her to a greyhound and it fits. So I really don't care about his little rendezvous with the greyhound and that other girl who...well I'm not sure what she does.

Wish me luck on my interview with The Hardest (Working) Man in Showbiz! I just bought a $40 digital recorder. I lost my old one. What a waste! I think it was stolen...by the ghost and it will turn up when I don't need it. Always happens. The ghost always takes it. I believe it's a ghost from a past life that likes to see me spend my money when I don't have much. It's a rather cruel ghost dontcha think?

I'm so glad you all love my body. I've been told my tits are saggy by people who chose to remain anonymous. Julie Fab reminded me that they remain anonymous because they are afraid to put themselves out there and resent people who do. Sometimes I forget that. No my boobs aren't saggy they are triple D's and natural. So if you think that natural triple D's can be bouncy and perky you are being lied to by the girl who is telling you that her perky boobs are natural.

So yes I'm going to ask for money again. I need to go to LA so I can be on Playboy radio, interview Fatty D, Anna Biller, and a few more that haven't confirmed yet but I'm sure they will. I want to go in March but I may have to wait until April. So if you have a few bucks to spare or if you want to buy some of the pictures you see here on the site with a little message from me written on them please do. I also make calendars. I know it's late but I'll make it up by including the months that I missed to next year. They are really fun and home made. So think about it. Remember I do this for free so it would be nice if you let me know how much you appreciate it.

2007-02-04T16:37:00.000-06:00

In order to prepare for my interview with Ron Jeremy, I'm reading his book and it's really good! I enjoy reading and when I am reading a book I really love it effects me deeply. My mood changes to match the mood of the book. It's really cool to reflect on but not always fun to go through. For example, I cry a lot when I read Joyce Carol Oats yet I have a hard time putting her books down. And when I read fantasy novels I tend to think that impossible things are possible, like knights in shining armor.

Lately, I've been reading autobiographies, specifically porn star autobiographies. Instead of turning into the porn stars which would be fun, I tend to fall for them. This happens when ever I read non-fiction about celebrities. It's a little more difficult to fall for the ones who use ghost writers whose style of writing is too different than the way we expect the celebrity to talk. Tracie Lords' book was hard to read. But then again she hardly talked about her porn career which is the only reason why she is a celebrity. She used a ghost writer that wasn't quite her style-or it wasn't what I expected. I figured she was in a hurry to get this story out and clear her name once and for all. But all she did was bore me.

Jenna Jameson's book sounded like it was being told by a couples counselor. All the cartoons and pictures made the book fun to read, but I got a little sick of hearing about how great she was. Even when she was on drugs she was great-the best drug taker of all the drug takers. She's very beautiful but I'm sure she takes a huge dump once and a while like everyone else (wait I'm sure she takes a shit better than anyone too, so I just can't win). I don't need to hear about how much better she is than everyone and that no one will ever be able to achieve what she has a well as she did. It seemed like everyone she met told her she was the best and she made sure we all knew about it. She wasn't as bad a Tracie was. While Tracie was in the business she made sure that everyone around her knew that she was the highest paid and most wanted porn actress. She also talked about her status in her book.

But back to Ron. When I read his book it reads like I believe he narrated it. I like to imagine myself sitting next to him resting my head on his shoulder while he lets me into his past and tells me about all the great adventures he experienced.

In most of the books I have read that tell the story of pornography origins, there is always the story of Linda Lovelace. I bought Deep Throat 6 years ago before I had ever even seen it. I was at Frenchies, an adult book store near Chicago's Magnificent Mile, with my boyfriend. Women had to be escorted by men into Frenchies by a man. We bought lube and I wanted to buy a porn. Deep Throat seemed like a good choice and if I was going to pay $30 for a movie I wanted it to be a good one. It was a video tape and it came in this huge box that doesn't fit on my shelf. We didn't watch the movie that night, my boyfriend was too turned on by me buying pornography, nipple clamps and a cock ring. When we finally did watch it we were kind of disgusted. there was sooooo much hair! And all the mustaches too! I like facial hair now but it was totally out for me during the '90's. I made all my boyfriends shave theirs off. I told them it wasn't 1977 and if they didn't shave I would take them to boys town and let them get fucked in the ass buy some big gay guy wearing leather. They shaved for me not because I was serious but because I was a great cock sucker.

The controversy surrounding Linda Lovelace has always perplexed me. I wonder who is telling the truth, Chuck Traynor or Linda Lovelace. Ron Jeremy says in his book that if a smart and beautiful woman like Marilyn Chambers could stay married to Chuck Traynor then he probably didn't abuse her. At first I believed Linda. But after reading so many witnesses say that she was enjoying herself, I just couldn't believe her anymore. I only wanted to believe her because I couldn't handle the bestiality involved. I do think Traynor hit Linda many people tell about her bruises. But what's even crazier was that I hardly ever read about any drug use other than pot. I was in an abusive relationship once and as soon as I stopped doing drugs I left. Funny how clear things are when you stop taking drugs. If Linda wasn't taking drugs why did she stay? The woman is a mystery. I don't want to read her book because she says that she was used by feminists like Andrea Dworkin so most likely the book isn't factual. But then again she may have been legitimately stupid and stupid people intrigue me. I am fascinated by Jerry Springer guests because I wonder why they would subject themselves to that kind of ridicule. All of my scrutiny leads me to only one answer-that they are actually very, very stupid. And I want to know how people can be that stupid in this time-with all the information so readily available to us.

But then again many will think this post is the pot calling the kettle black. People don't understand why I choose to get naked and show the world my sacred parts. They think sex is a gift that you give someone. Well, I believe sex is also a gift you give yourself and getting naked is what I do and I like it. Finding my body beautiful proves that the ideal woman doesn't have to be a size zero. So here you go:

2007-01-31T20:46:00.000-06:00

My interview with Mark Torgl is up on MrSkin.com. Read it here. Mark is the actor who played Melvin in Toxic Avenger. He's held a lot of tits thanks to Lloyd Kaufman. And he's not a big dork like the characters he plays in the movies. He's a pretty sexy guy and I'm going to meet him when I go to LA.

Now Mark edits reality shows. I guess that means he is responsible for making people look like idiots. What a fun job!

2007-01-30T18:33:00.000-06:00

I wanted to get the below post up before I left from work today and in my haste I left some things out....

First, I didn't think it needed a picture but don't worry I have a few more to post, like this one, before the next shoot. The shoot will hopefully be soon because I need to show off my new hair. It's really hot and I hope you all like it.

Second, Water Tower theaters were closed for a few years. They have since re-opened and show "Art House" movies. I haven't been since. When my friend was a security guard not only did we fuck in the theater we smoked pot with the other guards in there too. We frequently went to the roof which was almost 80 stories. I've see the Air and Water Show twice from that roof top and I've seen the Navey Pier fireworks too many times to count. We had a lot of fun.

The hallway he led me through was the basement and it was filled with pipes. I left out how I fell a few times because it just wasn't sexy.

Third, Oprah lived in the Water Tower condo's. I've seen her with her little dogs. And Water Tower was right next to the Ritz Carlton and we've seen Madonna, Mick Jagger and Paul McCartney sneak through the dock to avoid fans. No I didn't meet any of them.

Forth, this weekend was similar because I was tied to my couch and received similar pussy attention. I still walk a little funny. Bless you men for knowing how to play with the pussy correctly. I watched a Christy Canyon porn and in it she got some of the best pussy action and I had to have some of my own.

Ever since that night, I enjoy being bent over and having my ass and pussy played with. I'm not very into being tied up or blindfolded although sometimes it's necessary. Sometimes I have them put me over a chair or the couch. My favorite is having my ass propped up by pillows-no less than three so my ass is nice and high. If I'm tied the best way is to have my wrists tied to my knees which spreads me wide and opens me up. It's heaven. Oh, I'd better stop before I want some more and get on the phone again.

All you lovers, leave some comments. I want to hear from you. I love hearing from you. And if you are a hair dresser, thank you but I already have one and I visited her this weekend. So please let it go!

2007-01-29T23:27:00.000-06:00

What happened to me this weekend was not that different than what happened to me a few years ago when I was "caught" sneaking into Water Tower Place late at night.

My friend was a night security guard at Water Tower and he decided to teach me a lesson after I had handcuffed him to a chair and gave him the blow job of a life time. He wasn't happy with me because I made him cum before he was ready.

For my punishment he made me strip down to my g-string. He handcuffed my hands behind my back and blindfolded me. With his hand around my upper arm he pulled me awkwardly which made me trip and stumble leading me down a very long hallway. Instead of helping me when I stumbled he slapped my ass hard and I yelped loud. "Shut Up!" he yelled stopping me. I heard the sound of fabric rubbing against fabric and then felt silk being pulled across my mouth. I was now gagged. I got another slap and we moved on.

Next he let go of my arm and pushed me forward and I stumbled around wondering where I was or what he was going to do next. I stood there for what seemed like hours. I didn't want to make any noise. I wanted him to think I was strong and defiant. But I almost broke my silence but then I felt something lightly touch my nipples. They were very sensitive, both cold and aroused. Whatever he touched me with was so soft and the touch was so light. I felt it so deep that the sensation rippled throughout my body from the tips of my fingers and toes it shivered up my legs and arms down my back, chest and stomach until it hit my clit and it started to throb. I let out a moan as cum oozed out of me and slicked down my lips and moistened my thighs. Then the sensation stopped and again there was nothing.

Nothing. I was shaking and moaning louder and louder. I didn't care if he hit me anything would have felt good at this point. Then a hand slammed against my right ass cheek. He hit me so hard that I screamed through my gag and saliva soaked the silk and dripped down my chin at the same time cum was running down my inner thigh. I never thought I could cum without insertion or clitoral stimulation but my clit throbbed and my pussy was dripping. My knees started to buckle and my legs seemed to have a mind of their own. Just before I fell he caught me and I leaned against him as he walked me further. Not too much further and through the blindfold I could see a light.

He sat me in a cushioned chair and I heard he walk away. I waited naked on this chair listening to him move around. I heard zippers and snaps, buckles and velcro. I hoped he was undressing but when he got closer and picked me up my breasts rubbed against pants, his belt buckle and then his shirt as I rose. He turned me around and ordered me not to talk as he removed my gag. He put a water bottle up to my lips and let me have a drink. Then he got behind me put his hand on my back and pushed me forward bending me at the waist over the back of a chair. Cold steel hit my stomach and I tensed up. He rubbed my back gently telling me it was ok and it wasn't going to hurt too much. He unlocked my handcuffs releasing my hands and bringing my left arm forward over the chair and with the cuff still around the left wrist locked me to what I assumed was the arm of the chair. I heard clinking and felt my right hand being brought forward and the clicking of another set of handcuffs fastened my right wrist to the other arm of the chair. He then walked away for a minute and came back with something soft and placed it between my tummy and the back of the chair.

He pushed me forward so that my head hit the chair seat. I was in a movie theater because the seat was up and I could feel the other two seats on both sides of me. He bent me so far over that my feet were no longer touching the floor. I felt each ankle being tied to the arms of the chair behind me. My ass was pointing to the ceiling and I could feel my pussy opening. Behind me I heard snaps like rubber bands then he unscrewed the top of something. Next thing I felt was his fingers cold and wet smearing lube all over my ass and pussy. I know why he tied my legs up because the sensation made my legs jerk and I would have kicked him uncontrollably.

I felt his tongue lick my lips and poke my clit. His fingers drove into my pussy. One finger then two prying me open. My cunt throbbed and I could feel my lips pulsing. His fingers stroked and massaged my groves and into my cunt then out, in then out, in then out. I was panting and whimpering into the soft cushion of the chair. I forgot all about the uncomfortable position I was in all I could think about was the pleasure I felt in my crotch. One finger pushed the nerve ending over and over then ran down my lips into my vagina exploring, pushing into me. My breathing was quick as he made his way up, up and then he slowly slid it into my ass. I screamed and came all over his hand. My body jerked and the contractions racked my body. The orgasm shivered up my spine and jerked my head up as my moans echoed throughout the theater.

I thrashed around so much one of my legs broke free causing my body to fall slightly. He quickly pulled out and grabbed my hips before I was hurt. It wouldn't have mattered if it hurt I wouldn't have felt it any way. My other leg was released and the handcuffs were removed. I felt a towel gently wipe my bottom brushing my clit sending vibrations through my body once again as I let him carry my weight. Next thing I knew I was being lowered to the floor. His knee pushed my legs apart. He was still wearing pants. He was breathing hard and fast. His hands ripped off my g-string.

I heard a buckle and a zipper and then he slammed his hard cock into me. My whole body responded and my skin was covered with goosebumps. My nipples were so hard they hurt. I raised my hips to meet each thrust which was fast and hard. Each thrust he slammed into me felt like an orgasm. I heard screaming and realized it was coming from me. His mouth covered mine to shut me up. His lips were wet and his tongue was hot as it licked mine. He the pulled up and removed my blindfold and his blue eyes bore into mine. We just stared at each other pounding into one another.

As soon as I started to come he let out a moan and tried not to look away as I let the contractions take over my body. I felt my lips squeeze his cock until he let out a yell sat up quickly and sprayed his cum all over my tits. It hit my chin then my mouth and I licked it while I watched him stroke his cock squeezing every last drop out.

I rubbed his cum into my breasts watching the sweat drip from his forehead. We got up and looked around at the abandoned theater. We gathered our stuff and went out in search for my clothes.

That is the story of my first cavity search.

2007-01-28T12:24:00.000-06:00

These two sites intrigued me this week:
la fille mariée
and
Polyamorously Perverse

I found la fille mariée on a post on Porn Hater about Sugasm #62's top blogs of the week. Fille's writing is very erotic and turned me on. The blog is about her journey into debauchery and is very dramatic urging me to return day after day to read the next sexual entry. I commented on her "Beautiful Cock" entry and it prompted a few people to write to me. One of them was Polyamorously Perverse. I've always found polyamorous relationships fascinating and am, as to be expected, very skeptical of their success. (That may sound weird coming from me. Just so you understand, I am not in a polyamorous relationship. I am not in any relationships that are serious at all. My lovers are friends not potential life partners.) So I am going to read his journal and see how his relationship progresses.

I'm amazed at the responses to the last post. I had no idea I would get an "ugly" about my ass. Not that I don't appreciate the nice tits part of the comment but ugly kinda sucked to hear. And another agreed with me about my ass not being my best asset. The EP was pissed of course. HE said my ass was perfect for my body and that it was beautiful and something that he loved to squeeze, spank, kiss and suck all the time. He always makes me feel good. I'm not mad at the people who wrote the comments, I published them. The negative comments were not necessary at all.

For every 1 negative comment or email I get I am showered with at least 10 beautiful and flattering comments. I love that all of you support me. So enjoy this picture.

Also, I am writing a new post in Road To Christy Canyon. I just got Teenage Christy Canyon. I had so much fun with that this weekend and I'm writing a new recap on the blog. I'm not sure when it will be finished. All I know is that I will have fun writing it.

If you are curious about whether or not I had the weekend that I planned the snswer is: Yes! OOOOOHHH YES!!!!

2007-01-27T13:13:00.000-06:00

An email came the other day and it wasn't a very encouraging message. This person told me that I was narcissistic and had mental problems. I am very aware that my blog is narcissistic. Mental problems, I'm not so sure. The idea of normal is not so clear anymore. Who knows what is normal today. I write this blog and post nude pictures of myself because I want to. I don't do it for anyone else. I do like the attention and hearing that I am pretty. As someone who used to be 50 pounds heavier I am very proud of myself for losing the weight. I also don't think I am thin so showing off my body and getting compliments proves that women don't have to be really thin to be desired.

But I'm not really trying to get a feminist message across with the blog either. This blog isn't about how society is wrong about women. The negative emails and messages I received have proven that. The messages just underline that people are too involved with others lives and not their own. If these people want to judge me it only says that they are just as screwed up as they think I am if not more. Why would anyone care what I do if it doesn't impact their lives at all? I don't think me posting pictures or writing about myself is going to kill hurt or kill anyone.

I don't like being judged. I judge celebrity, I admit to that and it's wrong, but its really funny. I don't judge people next door. I don't go to other people's blogs and tell them they are pieces of shit. I don't want to hurt anyone.

I just want to have fun. Emailing me or leaving nasty comments is not going to change me and make me stop writing or posting pictures. One person tells me he's worried about me. I'm flattered but I want to know how exactly someone half way around the world is going to impact my life. If the message was meant to make me see something new it didn't. I did realize that my writing has been more about me personally rather than the things I am doing, places I'm going and people I meet. I was aware of that change and am planning on changing back. I took a break from working. Winter brought me down. I'm still down but not as much as before. I have accepted winter and have to suffer through. Moving to a warmer area looks better every 13 degree day.

So now for some pictures! I'm very insecure about my ass. This picture I used a filter to mask my insecurities. I think it looks neat.

This picture is from the cleaning set. The dark root set. Soon I need to do another shoot.

I guess the point of this post aside from me showing off and begging for attention, is to let you know that I won't post nasty comments so don't bother. If you don't like what you see here just shut up and go somewhere else. No one is holding a gun to your head and making you look at my blog. If someone is it's not my problem and that's really weird-good luck with that.

And to those of you who send me nice comments and email me sweet words, I love you. You make me smile and feel like I can conquer the world. Thank you so much!

2007-01-25T19:00:00.000-06:00

Yes I like to clean. I watch TV and want to own all cleaning supplies advertised. I want vacuums and I have hard wood floors. But I used to have a carpet in my last place and it's always good to be prepared.

So in case you are asking no I don't normally clean my own house nude. At least not in the winter. I usually clean the bathroom last since that makes me feel the dirtiest. So I'm usually pretty naked when I'm in there and I take a shower afterward. The whole experience is about being clean with my body being the final room to clean. This particular time I was not at home and got cleaned in other ways.

I've been exploring other erotic blogs lately. I'm not sure that this is an erotic blog. I'll maybe talk about that later. Ironically they led to this site and I've spent the last couple of hours trying to learn how to be a sexier Christian. I'm learning how to laugh that's for sure.

They have a Q and A section and one of the questions "Is it OK to masturbate?" which prompted this answer:

It is our belief that masturbation is not inherently wrong (for more on that see the masturbation section ), but there do seem to be some very valid concerns about masturbation by married folks. We are commanded to meet our spouse's sexual needs, and any masturbation which limits our ability to do this is wrong. Additionally, if we feel a need to masturbate, that is a sign our spouse is not meeting our needs . But what if one person has a much stronger sex drive? It seems to us that this does not "relieve" the less-interested person of responsibility for meeting their spouse's sexual needs. If masturbation is needed more than occasionally it may well be a sign of a problem. It is also a concern if a person's spouse is unaware of masturbation, or is unaware of how frequent it is.

And what if one spouse in unable to have sex because of sickness or physical limitations? In this situation masturbation seems a reasonable option, but we would suggest it is best done in the presence of the spouse. This significantly reduces the chances of wrong thoughts, and allows the partner to be a part of the activity by holding the one masturbating, offering some form of stimulation, or describing what they could be doing if they were both able to have sex.

I feel so dirty. I'd better take off my clothes and clean the house...with my new vacuum.

PS: So yes MK when you IM'ed me I was mopping naked.
And I got the Ron Jeremy interview!

2007-01-23T07:34:00.000-06:00

This is my attempt to be sexy in a wet t-shirt. It was not fun getting all wet in the middle of winter after being naked and cleaning. Don't worry I have more naked cleaning pictures coming. I just didn't save any this morning so this will have to do. There is nipple. You can see it. I'm trying to convey more with my modeling. Getting a little adventurous. I'm bored with just being naked. Just lying there on my back which makes my stomach look the best.

So three days after the Golden Globes and I finally have something to say. I think for the last three days I was just in shock and put them out of my mind. I only watched 5 minutes of it but I checked with all my favorite blogs for the re-cap on the dresses. There was a lot about the men but I really don't care about the men unless they look ridiculous. Prince and Johnny Depp always deliver. I am so disappointed about the state of celebrity fashion. It looked like prom night 1991. What's with all the taffeta, white and toga's? It was really a disgusting parade of Hilary Clinton's walking the red carpet. My fear is that I am going to be attacked by taffeta at a club because the public copies the famous. I like it when dresses are see-through and people make complete asses out of themselves by wearing plaid and floral together. We can expect no nip-slips this year. Is that what happened? Everyone covered up protecting their nipples? I hope not. The boringness of the whole affair bled through to the fashion. Award shows are too boring! I'd rather be naked than wear so much fabric. I don't think many women read my blog so I'll consider myself safe from any comments regarding fashion opinions.

All this blahness has given my libido a jump start. I have to go on a sex excursion this weekend. I'll start making calls right now in fact. I need to run around and get fucked. Maybe I'll even do a porno for you-I mean write about one. I don't have any filmmakers banging on my door for me to star in their porno. If they were I'm not sure I would participate. It's after the holiday's anyway and even though I've gotten complimenting emails asking if I have lost weight I still feel pudgy from consuming so much chocolate over the last month. Watching my body giggle while I get banged might put me in a mental hospital. It may look good to you but to me I will see a hippo. And I've never seen myself cum. A friend of mine was amazed that I didn't masturbate in the mirror but I close my eyes most of the time. I have to shut out everything except what's going on in my pussy in order to have a great orgasm by myself. I do look when there is someone watching me.

Thant made me creamy.
Good.
I have a very exciting weekend to look forward to.

2007-01-22T15:06:00.000-06:00

I've been caught! I tried to fool you all but I couldn't hide it any more. I'm not a natural blond!!!! My roots are showing! OMG! Thank you to that person who pointed it out or else I never would have known. I stare into he mirror every day I don't know how I could have missed it. These pictures are proof. I must have not been paying attention. I will get this fixed as soon as I get an extra $200. I have a few more pictures to post from this batch and if the roots offend go somewhere else. I'm not wasting good nudity on hair problems. Just so you all can see how right this person is examine the following pictures closely-if you can hold your supper in.

2007-01-21T16:31:00.000-06:00

I had no idea that I would get so many comments and emails about my Garden State post. I always knew my feelings about Garden State were in the minority. I have to admit that when I was young I liked every John Hughs movie and loved the character that John Cusack played in all his movies. Now, after experiencing life a little, my tastes have changed and what I like to see in movies is completely different. I no longer want to see epic romances claiming that love conquers all. I want to see more of the fantastic. That's why I love B-Movies. They're absurd. They make fun of everything. It makes me happy so see a light spin on reality. I'm very cynical and I don't like crying. Although Garden State didn't make me cry The Notebook did. I try to stay away from movies that evoke that kind of feeling. I don't want to waste my time hoping for some prince to come and save me. Right now I want to save myself which is really what this blog is all about. Yeah I turn you on with nudity and erotica but you would be surprised how much more this blog helps me. My connection with all of you fills a void that I used to fill with men and substances. It's what I think about all day. "How can I make them laugh today?" It keeps me somewhat consistent by updating it every day. I may never get that epic romance but what I have here is much better.

Since I got off so much by hearing from you guys about Garden State, I'm gonna throw something else out there. Dane Cook has been having a MySpace fight with Alex Blagg and it's highly amusing. I surfed the net about Dane Cook and found all this stuff about how he stole jokes from Louis CK and that a bunch of other comedians hate him. I saw Dane Cook a while ago on some show and he annoyed me to death. All that jumping around and screaming is, to me, just a tactic to hid behind unfunny material. He is way too physical for me and I didn't really think his jokes were all that funny. People think he is brilliant and the funniest comedian ever. I don't get it. I heard the jokes he supposedly stole and I have to say that they are remarkably similar. But I'm not sure how much I care about stealing jokes. I usually don't care that much but it consumed me this weekend so I'm blogging about it.

I've been naked sewing and naked cooking, now I am naked cleaning. The floor was dirty and I didn't have time to get dressed.

2007-01-18T19:59:00.000-06:00

I've been drinking these canned Mexican fruit juices. They are made by Goya which I think is the only food manufacturer in Mexico because they make EVERYTHING sold in Bodega's and Super Mercado's all over the city. I think they're making me overly sensitive and bloated. I'm having a hard time watching Ugly Betty. Daniel's about to get screwed and I wonder how Betty is going to get him out of it. Why would anybody want to hurt these very lovable characters? It brings a tear to my eye. So I think I should stop drinking these Goya drinks. They are also making me bloated and I feel really fat. So goodbye Fresa y Banana!

Maybe not. Betty got Daniel out of it without embarrassment. I DVR'd the show. When I turned it off I puked up Fresa y Banana. Zach Braff and his embarrassing Garden State is on IFC. Natalie Portman is just so cute and gee Zach Braff and his slow depression makes him such a heart throb.

Movies like this are what makes me gravitate toward bad movies and porn. They don't portray life realistically. Neither do B-movies or porn but at least they are fun. Movies like Garden State are about boredom disguised as mental illness covered with a sweet candy shell. Who needs to watch Braff staring longingly at his best freind played by Peter Sarsgaard. What? Dumbass! Stop staring at me! But Pete doesn't say that he just stares back. Then Zach goes to Nat's house and watches a tape of her skating in an alligator costume. You can see him falling in love with her in this scene, also, you can see me shoving needles in my eyes.

When I was 21 if a guy like the character Zach Braff plays in Garden State walked into my life, I'm sure I would have loved the shit out of the tear filled dude and moved in with him. But at 25 I would have beat him to a pulp and left him in the corner for the bug-eating motor cycle guy that didn't care if I lived or died waiting outside. I wouldn't even notice Zach mushing his face into the window as he watched me fade away on the back of the bike. Wait, that did happen but I was 28 and the bug-eater drove a truck. I guess it could be real but it doesn't end well for the wimpy guy. So I don't understand why Braff wrote the piece of shit. He pulled every trick out of the book: dead mom, psychiatrist dad, druggie best friend, epileptic girlfriend-how sweet. How could you not love this movie? Enough! I've wasted enough ink on the schmuck!

Go here: life of a star. This girl Anna is really hot and she gets naked! I'm going to interview her. She is really talented. Women like Anna inspire me to get more done. But not tonight. Tonight I need sleep.

Trying to find a picture for this entry was hard. I took some new pictures this weekend but they aren't ready yet. So I had to find something that wouldn't bore me. So I'm posting something I rarely post. In fact I think I've only posted it once before on the other blog. I don't like giving it away for free. But I'm happy I've been getting so many sexy interviews. So to celebrate, you get my shaved pussy for free. My pussy will not be making regular appearances so enjoy it while you can. If you wan to see it in many different positions with fingers or unshaved, you need to buy the pictures. I'll write something sexy on the picture and you can whack off to it as much as you want. Make sure you tell me about it too.

Enjoy.

2007-01-15T20:59:00.000-06:00

It snowing in Chicago. I left work and got bus number one and somehow lost my bus card. I never do that. I'm never this careless. The card had $20 on it, enough to get me through the week. I had to walk over a mile because I didn't have cash on me to get bus number two. I left my ATM card at home on purpose so I wouldn't spend any more money (I still want to go to New York). I walked over a mile to my apartment in the snow in four inch heels. Monday's suck! And so does winter! Now I will spend my laundry money on the bus. Don't feel sorry for me make a donation and buy some pictures. They come without the drawn-on panties.

At home I flipped on the TV ready for a night of Law and Order. Basketball is ruining my evenings. Law and Order should just have it's own channel. I turned on the guide and the Golden Globes were on. I actually started to panic. This is true, I am not exaggerating. My hands started shaking and I broke out in a sweat. I used to love award shows. Celebrities used to be so much fun to watch. Awards were given to deserving artists and it was fun to watch them parade around in their fancy dresses. Now award shows are all about who's the most popular and who makes the studios the most money.

But, I feel like it is my duty to watch the awards, so I flipped them on. I missed the beginning which was a relief. On the TV was George Clooney and smug assholeness oozed from my screen. I was waiting for him to pontificate about how farting accomplishes more than George Bush can ever hope to. Thankfully, he was giving out an award and not accepting one. Best Actress, I think. He announced some foreign women from the movie Babel I didn't know, Emily Blunt (who?), J-Hud (Jennifer Hudson of American Idol turned star of Dream Girls) and Cate Blanchett (from--it doesn't matter because she's been naked in films and deserves every award she is nominated for).

J-Hud won and I really don't care. I was expecting her to win. I don't really expect much from the motion picture association or whatever produces this show. The people who win rarely deserve it anymore. These award shows have become just as shallow and vapid as beauty pageants. It's all about money and popularity. If J-Hud didn't win thousands of little girls would have thrown hissy fits and might not watch again next year (really?) Kate Blanchett really acts, J-Hud just yell-sang into a microphone and acted mad because Beyonce was getting all the attention she wanted. Which was probably what was really going on during the filming. I think she's a great singer but she isn't a better actress than Cate Blanchett. I don't think anyone believes that either so I'm not really sure what these awards are for anymore.

No, I wasn't mad or upset until the camera showed the tear-filled eyes of Beyonce. I have respect for my belongings so I repressed the desire to throw the remote into the TV and changed the channel. I can't handle that shit. It's so fucking fake. I'm so sure Beyonce is that "happy" for J-Hud. Piece of shit! I wish she would just stick to singing, looking hot and wearing the ridiculous dresses her mommy makes for her.

So you wanna know what I turned on instead? I Love New York. I'm not kidding. I would rather watch a menagerie of men trip over themselves trying to be black enough for Flavor Flav's regurgitated left-overs than watch Beyonce cry. Granted, Beyonce is much easier to look at than New York but Beyonce is boring, boring, boring and New York is crazy, crazy, crazy! It's hilarious.

I watched the 1st show and her Latin Lover called Rico called her something in Spanish that meant "my little black bootie baby" or something, and she got spitting mad. He explained to her that it meant something nice in Latin and she said "Yeah, but I'm not from Latin!" I peed my pants!

The EP thinks that most of the men are gay but I think there is only one guy that's gay. His name is Romance-see she gives them all nicknames like Flav did on his show because she is incapable of being original. Romance cried the entire two episodes he was on because his dog Princess died and he loves New York so much. It was really creepy and I'm sure the producers begged her to keep him around but by show two she kicked him out. He cried and all his love for New York fell out of his stretched out asshole as he insulted her. He then took a moment to collect himself and lisped "But I'm a profeshional." Homo!

Her mother, I'm sorry, her Moms said the best line yet, "I looked between his legs and saw something green and mossy looking and I wonder if it's contagious?" I'm convinced that New York's Moms is really her Dads.

I flipped the Awards back on as Tom Hanks gave Warren Beatty the DeMille award. Hanks looks bad and Beatty looks old. When they panned the audience eveyone looked like shit. Bad lighting. If I ever get into making movies I am going to stay away from good movies. I do not want to be seen in that lighting. Beatty didn't make any sense. I think he just licked Clint Eastwood, Jack Nicholsen and Annette Benning's asses which I hear he liked to do when he was younger anyway. I changed the channel and watched the White Rapper show. Wow, I'm a loser!

So that's what I did tonight. Now I'm going to transcribe an interview for little and figure out how I'm going to get to work tomorrow.

2007-01-14T17:24:00.000-06:00

My Saturday photo shoot was postponed until today. I bought an Elle magazine the other day and scrutinized it. I have not been paying attention to fashion since I began writing. I used to read Vogue, Bizarre and W magazine from cover to cover. I bought Elle because I'm thinking about trying out for Project Runway and Elle magazine is the major sponsor for the competition. I'm starting to have second thoughts about trying out. I don't like the way people are portrayed on reality shows. I'm not sure I want to risk being edited as a slut or an idiot. Maybe later I'll get into why but right now I want to talk about these pictures.

I was trying to think of new ideas for photos. When I was a little girl I wanted to be a fashion model. But my height and breasts made that impossible. Fashion
photography has always turned me on. Helmut Newton is one of my favorite photographers.

His work has always been considered sexist because it depicts women as victims. I think his photography is simply driven by sex. He liked seeing women in submissive roles. It's just a preference and people who criticize his work miss that. Just like people who criticize pornography. People who want to produce pornography are just doing what they want to do. It's what drives them and brings out their creativity. I'm not talking about Gonzo porn or a lot of what is being produced today. But I really don't want to turn this blog entry in that direction. It think it's pretty evident what my preference is.

Back to fashion. If I can't be a fashion model in magazines, I'll be one on here. Since I look much better half in and half out of clothes I'm half in and out of my jacket.

I made this jacket a few years ago. It took me 2 days because there was a large amount of hand sewing. I'm sure no one will really notice how beautiful this jacket is because my boobs are in the way, but I'm very proud of it. And no, I did not make the jeans.

We took a total of 5 pictures of this jacket and these were the only ones I liked. I'm not smiling the them, but fashion models don't really smile. Some do (like the one above) but it's rare. I think I look a bit ridiculous trying to look all chic but my tits look fantastic. And this is me after a week of eating chocolate for dinner. I'm pretty happy I didn't gain too much weight. The buttons are awesome too.

2007-01-13T13:49:00.001-06:00

This picture may look familiar. It's just like the picture of me and Tiffany I posted about a week ago. This is Chad. I went to High School with Chad. We weren't friends back then. I knew him and I think we went to some of the same parties but never hung out together.

About a year ago, my friend saw Chad's profile on myspace so I contacted him. We are really good friends now. He has a ban called Jed, they are really good. It's so weird. I would never have guessed that one day I would have a picture of Chad holding my breast in a bar. Chad and Tiffany were afraid we would get kicked out. I thought that was really funny seeing how the DJ invited me and posed with me too.

His name is Jamie and he DJ's every Wednesday night the The Rock Party. It was a lot of fun. He also produces the Local 101 Show on Q101. Q101 is a popular radio station in Chicago. I'm not a big fan of Q101. The new alternative music confuses me. Now I feel like my parents when they couldn't understand my music. But it really all sounds the same to me. I listened to the Cure and the Smiths when I was younger. Those two bands were never played on the radio and made rare appearances on MTV. Now when there is a classic 80's show on VH1 they play a bunch of Cure and Smiths. I'm confused, why is it popular now and when I was younger I was called a freak because I listened to it? I wanted to punch the prom queen who screamed "I love this song!" when "Somebody" by Depeche Mode played at my 5 year reunion. First of all, it's an annoying song that I liked when I was 15. I grew up and realized how gay it was. Secondly, she never listened to that when it came out! She was listening to Motley Crue or the Greatful Dead (I forget which her boyfriend was, a Dead Head or a Burn Out. Those girls never made their own musical choices.) And I love how all these people are coming out and saying that the Pixies are the greatest band ever. I bought Doolittle when it came out in 1989 and listened to it every day! The first time they heard it was probably when the Pixies formed their reunion tour. I obviously have a very strong opinion about music.

I'm babbling. But I am wearing the pixies hoodie in these pictures. I get recognized when I wear it. Makes me feel like a celebrity.

Today I am going to have a photoshoot so check in tonight or tomorrow. Then I am all work and no play. I have to email potential interviewee's. And I also have to write up my interview with Mark Torgl. He played Melvin in the Toxic Avenger. What a surprise he was. The interview is fantastic! He is really talented and I'm so excited for you to read it. Now he edits reality TV shows and he loves it. How fun his life must be. We also talked about boobs! Stay tuned and I will let you know when that will be up.

2007-01-10T22:28:00.000-06:00

New Year's Eve pictures. This is what I look like drunk!

Here I am, surprised, at party number two. At this point I had consumed three screwdrivers and half a glass of Champagne. I later drank 2 Chocolate Martini's. I was drunk and I got stopped feeling hung.

Recognize this? At the first party an adoring fan wanted her own copy of the famous Pixies Breasts. I love it when my breasts are recognized before I am.

My beloved Commander Bob and I danced to Madonna. I met my Commander at a previous job. He was the marketing analyst and I was the RTV Coordinator. We smoked together. My boss was also named Bob. I kind of had a crush on my boss. But he was married. The three of us were inseparable. We went to lunch together every day. There was a problem though. When I asked Bob a question they would both answer. So my boss Bob became "Big Bob" and Bob became "Commander Bob" I became "Pretty Lady". I'm still Pretty Lady but we don't see Big Bob anymore. I love my Commander Bob. We both love Madonna. Commander Bob took me to a Madonna show once and I saw Joan Cusack. She is really really skinny! We had a great time. We both got hit on by guys. It was great.

There you have it, my New Year's Eve. I know, I'm in clothes. I'll take them off I just wanted to show you what I did that night.

2007-01-09T20:26:00.000-06:00

Unhappily, I think I have to let my dream of going to New York in February go. It is a very painful decision I have come to. There was so much there that was worth going into debt for. But unfortunately, I don't even have the money that I should not spend to spend on this trip. I hope it is understood that my insides are in agony over this decision. My heart is broken and as much as I'd like to blame that on an outside source, it is my own doing. My passionate behavior has driven away the one reason that would have made me risk my life here in Chicago to experience something that I had hoped was waiting for me in New York. It is the way I work. I am an expert at being a pest. Annoyance is a mistake I make from time to time. I risk my dignity and professional relationships to see if a fantasy can become a reality. It rarely becomes reality for me and when it does the high is worth it and I tried. I found that now is not the time. Hopefully soon it will be right and that fantastic reason in New York will still be there and I can embrace it like I long to do so now with the same fervor that occupies my dreams.

Instead I concentrate on Los Angeles and the beautiful and fantastic women that are waiting to teach me to be the woman I want to be. Men are once again on the back burner. I want to sit naked in oatmeal with Christy and caress Fatty Delicious' skin, I will be delirious with ecstasy!

Christy and Ginger are going to teach me how to have sex with the airwaves. Fatty Delicious is going to teach me to love my curves. And Elske is going to teach me how to scream while looking sexy in a bikini.

I almost lost it with this New York fantasy and I really wish I did but for now I have a reality to get to one with the most beautiful women in the world.

I can still dream about being an all day sucker in New York.

2007-01-08T07:41:00.000-06:00

Have I told you how much I love girls? Well here you go. Many friends of mine came to visit me over the holiday's and here is a picture from one of my nights out. This is Mistresschic and she wants to lick my tits. And oh my! I can't wait until she does! Isn't she hot! Whoo-Hoo!!! Unfortunately, the night we were together there were too many people around and we couldn't get intimate. I didn't want to share her. Can you blame me she's gorgeous!

Another girl I can't get enough of is Fatty D. I hope you guys are reading her blog. Make sure you keep your eye on this one. She's gonna be really famous one day. And I applaud her for making a place for large women in porn and making it look beautiful. I think that big women are not represented well in porn and we definitely need more women like Fatty D.

2007-01-07T19:29:00.000-06:00

To answer your question Chawck before we were interrupted by my phone call, yes I am a fan of Belladonna. Yet I find some of her movies a bit too extreme for me. The abundance of ass play and the enormous things that she shoves into her asshole and other assholes is too bizarre for me. She is adorable though and I'd love to meet her. I worry that someday she will have a problem controlling her bowels. In 20 years I can see her at a restaurant getting up and just unloading a big brown log right there at the table. Don't you agree? Something has to happen there. The asshole was not meant to take in that much stuff that often. Belladonna was really cute when I first started seeing her but now I just don't get it. But I don't judge and she seems really sweet. So I hope nothing bad happens to her because she brings many people many orgasms. That's why I am very excited to announce that I will be interviewing the adorable Fatty D! Ms. D co-starred with Belladonna in Evil Pink 2. She also was just recently featured as one of Fleshbot's Top Ten Crush Objects of 2006! I can add her to my list of women I will be posing nude with in 2007.

So I am ecstatic! This is going to be one hell of a year with tons of nudity and tons of fun!

2007-01-07T11:17:00.000-06:00

Don't you want to see the whole picture? Yes it's time again. I need money. And you can help. I need to go to New York as soon as possible. I may even have to get a hotel room so I really could use your help. In New York I can get to Troma and meet Lloyd Kaufman. Hey, maybe he'll put me in a movie. Wouldn't that be great? Maybe I'll get to make out with a girl, be a naked killer, or a naked victim. I don't care as long as I'm naked. Plane tickets to New York are pretty cheap right now but I also need a hotel and to get my hair done. I can't do this blond thing-too much maintenance. My hair is almost black naturally so I have to go back down a little. I want a nice easy Do with red and blond highlights. It'll be really hot and you'll love it. The top doesn't have to match the bottom as you know cause I shave it so it's nice a soft and easier for tongues to swirl around. Slippery and wet, just the way I like it. Gooey and pink is just right for a night of eating out. But if you like carpet you can request it. I don't mind growing it out for you. Fur flicked with droplets of my sex juice can be delicious on a cold winter night. You can wrap your tongue in my soft fur coat.

After New York I have to get back to LA so I can go play with Christy again. I need to relive that unforgettable day once again.
I know you want to help me so make a donation or buy my pictures. You wont regret it, I promise.

2007-01-04T22:58:00.000-06:00

Friday December 29th was not the day I posted the previous post. It was written today. What I do is post a picture at home so I can write the blog at work. I had a ton to do last Friday so I never got around to it.

Happy Birthday Remedy God! I will call you for lunch soon. I was just so yucky today.

My new boss asked me to look up parking in the building next door. I assumed he meant the Sears Tower. He didn't, he meant the other side. So the difference in price per month was about $55 to $100 dollars with the Sears Tower being cheaper. Since the CEO parks at the other building my boss wants to park there too. He said that he wouldn't mind because of the convenience. He only has to walk out the building and halfway down the alley. For the Sears Tower he has to cross a street. I don't know about you, But I would rather walk across the street to save $100. But of course it is obvious that there is a power struggle. I felt pretty shitty after he was willing to drop so much money to park in a garage when I can barely pay my rent. Fuckin' rich people! Tell me which outfit I would look best in.

2006-12-29T07:55:00.000-06:00

I've been a little under the weather. The New Years Eve parties were a bit much. Everyday this week I wake up and feel like I'm walking through molasses. Plus, I was making cookies and cut my finger pretty badly. I was washing the food processor blades and the blade went right into my pointer finger. Typing is not fun. I keep getting hand cramps from trying to keep my finger off the keys, I feel pain every time I forget.

I've been concentrating on TV lately. I usually just have it on and play on my computer. But being so sick has made me just lie on the couch and lose myself in TVland. Commercials piss me off. I'll bet Carmen Electra does not go to Taco Bell. The Weight Watchers commercials are really bad. Shelly who lost 52 pounds is finally getting married. So does this mean if women lose weight they'll get married? Come on! I'm glad I don't want to spend $3000 on a dress and $30,000 on the reception. But I digress. I really don't appreciate the message they are sending to women. If you lose weight you will get married. The rest of the commercial is fine. Girls jumping around, fitting into nice dresses, running on the beach and some other stuff. The girl on the hammock perplexes me. Isn't losing weight supposed to make you more energetic? So why is she laying on a hammock? I wont be going to Weight Watchers.

On to happier things. I need to get on track with the rest of my interviews that I am planning for this year. I hope this year is monetarily better than last. I have all of you guys to be in love with so I don't want a relationship. No I just want money so I can travel and meet sexy fun women actresses.

Like the picture. It was taken during the summer. Oh the summer, I miss it so!

2006-12-27T00:05:00.000-06:00

Every now and then I like to put on clothes for you guys.

You may recognize this picture as the profile picture on MySpace. I love this skirt. It took me 8 hours to make all those pleats. I watched Bruce Willis movies while I made it one Saturday. It's too big but the thought of taking even a few of the pleats out to re-size it makes me panic. So I just pin it to keep it from falling off.

Rear View.
Zippers used to be very hard for me. I would make skirts with elastic waist bands instead. I even re-drafted the patterns so I could put buttons in the place of the zipper. Re-drafting a pattern to allow for buttons is much more difficult than just putting the zipper in. But I avoided zippers like the plague so I did anything to not have them in my design. One day I had to put a zipper in. There was no way around it. I put the zipper in and took it out 5 times until I finally got it perfect. The next time I put one in it took me 3 tries. And now I can put them in with my eyes closed. Being able to put a zipper in made it easier to make more clothes. I could sew faster and I could make up to four or five skirts a day. Last spring and summer I made 20 different skirts. Now I have to conquer shirts.

Here is another one of my many skirts that I made over the summer. For fathers day I made a duvet for my dad. He loves duvets. I had a little fabric left over so I cut it into squares and put this skirt together. From what I've made so far and posted on this blog, its apparent that I like patchwork and quilting. I don't want to be known as a quilter. Quilting makes me think of Holly Hobby or Girl Scouts. But quilting is what I do the most. I use silks and fine fabrics. This skirt is made out of Indian Dupioni which is a shiny Thai silk. It's my favorite silk right now. I have a ton of it. The skirts I made for Christy Canyon are made out of Indian Dupioni.

OMG! A post not about sex! Can you believe it? Well I can't....

I make skirts also because I like to show off my legs and they allow for easy access to my pussy in public places. They come in handy when you want to have a quickie in the bathroom of a bar or in the office of one's editor.

2006-12-26T00:36:00.000-06:00

Happy day after Christmas! OMG! I'm so happy that's over! You can see the relief on my face in the above picture! It's such a stressful time of year! Now, we have six months of cold!

Enough of the exclamation points! Ha! Ha! Hee! Hee!

During the past week I had little to do except worry about the holiday. I worked, of course, but there wasn't much for me to do except live in my head. I get psycho sometimes. It's part of being a female. Everybody else seemed so busy and I felt so left out. I even wrote a sad blog about how jealous of my sister I was and how depressing my job is. If I weren't me I'd slap me. But I am me and I like getting slapped on the ass by other people. More on that later...

Ironically, I got a new computer. An iBook! Just what I wanted! I really am a spoiled brat. My sister works for a computer company and was able to find a refurbished iBook at a great price. She insisted that my parents buy it for me. I really have the best sister and parents in the world. Today, as soon as I arrived at my parents house, I looked under the tree and counted how many presents I had. I do this every year. I only had one so I kind of knew. But I thought it was a PC. Imagine my screaming when I saw the little apple peeking out from the box. I'm ecstatic! I can't sleep now I keep playing with it. I didn't even play with myself yet. Yet, people. You know I can't go a day with out playing with myself. I'll have to do that in order to get to sleep. So I'm extremely happy and don't care if everyone I want to play with is too busy. I have my new little apple! I may even blow off New Year's to play with it. Nah! Way too much fun is promised this year. I have guests coming in from out of town. So big orgies at Alix's this week! There's a new girl I'm very excited about. I hope she's cute. I hear she's into dominatrix stuff. S&M bores me. Ever since I heard that dominatrices regularly shit in their clients mouths I lost interest. Now whenever I see a whip wielding, black leather clad woman, I think of her "giving chocolate" to a pasty white little man in chains. It's so gross! Shit stinks! Literally! It's too bad, black leather is a good look. I've always liked being in super high stiletto boots and a black leather corset. Being tied up is fun too. I like being out of control and not being able to stop what is happening to me. As long as it feels good. Spanking and whipping is a little too rough for me. I like medium slaps on my ass not my tits. Just enough to get me wetter. It's best during sex when I'm on top. Cum pours out of me when I'm hit just right.

Good, I've gotten myself horny enough to have one hand down my pants while I type with the other. If I could eat myself out like Ron Jeremy can suck himself off, I wouldn't need to leave the house. I would be complete with my new computer and super flexible body. I can dream can't I? I always seem to want more. Good night everyone. Come out and play with me tomorrow. I miss you!

2006-12-23T00:31:00.000-06:00

I am at 4,998 views on this thing. Is that good? I broke open the wine a little early.

I made this dress in college:

It took me eight hours to make all those loops on the bodice. I got an A on it. I was so proud. It's falling apart now and doesn't fit me cause my boobs are too big. It never did.

This is the back:

In fashion design class we had to make everything a size 6. Then they brought in models that were size 2 and I wanted to kill myself. Not only would I never be a size 2 but my model couldn't fill out the dress and I had to pin it tighter on her which fucked up the whole look. I have no idea why they didn't teach us how to make clothing to fit our own bodies. I had to learn it later, after school. I feel like if they had taught me how to make clothes for myself I would have done better in school. I didn't care as much about the clothes. They were just going to sit in my closet and never be worn. Well, I did sell a few after school.

I sold this one:

And this one:

And I had the opportunity to sell the one I'm trying to wear, but I chose not to. I couldn't part with it. After spending 8 hours on it, I cared too much about it.

The dress on the only thing that fits it properly:

2006-12-22T07:20:00.000-06:00

Welcome to front to back Friday! if you look close enough you can see a pubic action in in the shower picture.

Later I'll write about my Water Tower encounter since so many of you emailed me wanting to hear about it. I only have about a half an hour to go here at work and I want to go home and get comfortable for the retelling of the story.

Meanwhile, enjoy the pictures.

2006-12-21T13:57:00.000-06:00

"Number 13 Baby"

got hair in a girl
that flows to her bones
and a comb in her pocket
if the winds get blown
stripes on her eyes when she walks slow
but her face falls down
when she go, go, go
black tear falling on my lazy queen
gotta tattooed tit say number 13

viva
don't want no blue eyes
la loma
i want brown eyes
rica
i'm in a state

choir in the yard
in the house next door
where a grandma brought
some songs from the shore
six foot girl gonna
sweat when she dig
stand close to the fire
when they light the pig
standing in her chinos shirt pulled off clean
gotta tattooed tit say number 13

viva
don't want no blue eyes
la loma
i want brown eyes
rica
i'm in a state

As you can see, I changed my name from Number13Baby to Alix Lakehurst. Number13Baby is the company name now. And you all know me as Alix any way. It is Alix, not Al, Ali, Lexi or Alexis. Just plain Alix. And Lakehurst is the name of the first movie theater I went down on a guy in. I've actually had sex in the Water Tower theater but Alix Water Tower sounds stupid. That was a fun night at Water Tower theater. It was deserted and one of the night security guards handcuffed me to the seats in the third row and preformed a thorough cavity search before fucking me silly in the aisle. He also had me walk naked and blindfolded through the basement of the mall. I think all the other security guards watched which made it even more exciting. The men in my life certainly know how to satisfy me.

Somebody get me this vibrator!

I have officially had way too many cookies, chocolate, cider and punch today!

2006-12-20T23:27:00.000-06:00

Some derriere for you guys.
When I was a little girl I would dress up in my mommy's pretty night gowns and run around the house pretending that I was a fairy princess. Now I have my own pretty nightgowns that I run around my own house in. And I really am a fairy princess. I live alone, I can do whatever I want. Up until about two years ago I collected books about King Arthur and the Knights of the Round Table. I have over 50 books on the subject and a deck of Arthurian tarot cards. It's kinda nutty. I used to want to be Morgan Le Fey.

I read The Mists of Avalon about 20 times. That's pretty amazing considering the book is like 500 pages long. I only read fiction and most of it was about King Arthur or dragons. Now I don't even pick fiction up anymore. It's so weird. I think I lost the urge when I realized I wouldn't ever be able to do magic nor would I find my King Arthur. Oh yeah and I stopped drinking a 5th of Vodka every night. That helped a bit. But when I was young I didn't need alcohol or drugs to go into my fantasy land. I over did it when I started drinking. I'm so glad I grew out of that. The drinking I mean. I really miss pretending that I am Morgan Le Fey and that King Arthur was whoever I was obsessed with at the time.

But today I realized...

Now my Morgan Le Fey takes a different form

And my King Arthur seduces me with words rather than swords.

Satisfied that I can still spin my reality into my fantasy.

Thank you all my chivalrous King Aurthur's out there! I make love to you in my dreams every night.

2006-12-19T18:48:00.000-06:00

I was going to put this in the comments section but I figure this is much easier for you to read. Oh yeah, and who am I kidding? No nudity! Give me a break! Send me money bitches! I get naked for you! It's Christmas for fuck's sake!

Chawkc, I will work on Misty Mundae. I actually saw her at the Horror convention in Chicago with the EP this summer. Right now I guess she is working as Erin Brown for Showtime's Masters of Horror series. She played, what else, a lesbian in Sick Girl. I've heard she is a little snobby but she is cute and I'll see what I can do. I do have the Seduction Cinema contacts on my itinerary. My juices start flowin' for Darian Caine she's sexy!

Az and Allie, welcome to my tits! My travel plans are LA, Vegas and New York right now. I've always wanted to go to Arizona. If I come out can I stay with you guys? Then we can put Allie's breasts right next to mine on the blog! Elske is very excited and I'll write more about her later.

2006-12-19T09:37:00.000-06:00

I went picture crazy. I hope you guys enjoy them. I do it for you. But times are getting tough and I'm thinking that free pictures isn't the way to go. So send me donations if you want more. I don't get a Christmas bonus. I just found that out. I'm great full for my paycheck and the benefits are a blessing but it's hard being a single girl in a big city. The bus alone costs me over $20 a week! And I have to take 2! I'm writing an angry letter to the CTA (Chicago Transit Authority) again. I watch buses pass me all morning because they are too full or they are express buses. Oh I'm sorry, the CTA has put me in a bad mood this morning. I had some person's bag hit me in the face a couple of times on the bus ride to work. It hurt! It's also Christmas and I'm stressed out. I found out that my parents already bought themselves the gifts I bought them! Oh my, a tear just fell down my cheek, I'd better change the subject.

On my list of interview's is a phenomenon known as Alicia Loren! I think you can see her on DivineBreasts.com. I can't check that to make sure. If it is wrong I will fix it later. I'm amazed by the size of her breasts (JJ!) and want to find out how she deals with them. I have a hard enough time with my own and I'm less than half her size. She is from Italy and absolutely adorable. I wish I could fly out to Italy to touch them and play with them. Now I know what you guys feel like when you see boobs!

Lastly, I left a message on Ron Jeremy's answering service. I think Ron is fantastic but I am not a fan of interviewing men. Women are so much more fun and it's really a compliment to the women I interview. Women generally want to impress other women far more than they want to impress men. Men are a little easier. I love you guys but I love my women subjects too. It's so good to have support from other women. I get very happy when I meet new women. I wish I could meet each and every one of you guys too but I'm only one person and low on funds. Back to Mr. Jeremy. He is supposed to be in Chicago on Friday so I left a message to see if he could give me 15 minutes. Not a lot to ask right? He's so cool but unfortunately, I found out that he would rather get paid for the interview. Too bad. It makes me sad. So I may not get an interview with him. I haven't heard from him so I'm not holding my breath. But I'll write a cute little ode to Ron post after I do a little more research.

So there you have it for Tuesday, December 19th. I'm broke and sad but happy about Alicia and perplexed about Ron. I'm keeping my chin up and as always send you all my love and kisses. I'm wet for you already!

2006-12-18T07:34:00.000-06:00

Hey did you know I could cook? Yep I'm a good little cooker and I like to do it in the nude too! So last night I had Julie come over to take some more pictures of me and in return I cooked spaghetti for her. We had so much fun. She really takes the best pictures of me. I'm so glad she's my friend.

I thought today I'd do something a little different for you guys. This is my spaghetti sauce recipe:

In a skillet sautée about half a tablespoon of chopped garlic in a tablespoon of olive oil for about 2 to 3 minutes. Add crumpled ground beef and brown. When the meat is browned add diced tomatoes. I use canned tomatoes so I don't have to peel them. Add half a can of tomato paste and stir. When it's pretty well mixed up add-and here's where it gets tricky-I don't measure I just add and taste until I like it. So I tried to time how long I shook the basil and oregano containers into the skillet. The basil was about six to eight seconds of shaking and the oregano was 4 seconds. I like more basil than oregano. You can do what you want. Stir all that around and let it simmer while you prepare the sauce. In a sauce pan mix the rest of the tomato paste (they usually come in very small cans-I don't look it could be 4 oz) with 2 8oz cans of tomato sauce. This time shake the basil for 6 seconds and the oregano for 3 seconds-you can always add more. Drop two bay leaves in and stir. When the paste and sauce are all mixed together add the meat mixture to the sauce mixture. Turn the heat down really low and cover. Let the sauce simmer for about 45 minutes to an hour stirring occasionally. This allows the ingredients to get married (Ha Ha! Lots of chefs like to use the term marry when talking about ingredients blending together). Boil some water in a larger sauce pan, add your favorite pasta, cook it for about ten minutes, drain it and presto. I think you know the rest.

It comes out better when you are naked, trust me.

2006-12-15T08:30:00.000-06:00

Another teaser! I just want you guys to know that you can see my pussy if you want. It's only $10 for 8x10 and $7 for 5x7. That's cheap! I'll sign them and rub my crotch on them. I know its' the holidays so I don't expect anything until after. Which incidentally is when I will need Money to fund my trips to New York and LA.

OMG! There is going to be a Die Hard 4! I'm so excited! I love Bruce Willis. I've been renting Moonlighting episodes and masturbating to them. I want to rub my crotch with his bald head and pants.

The EP wrote this thing in his blog about punching girls asses. It's funny. Unfortunately I don't have a punchable ass. It's nice and round but not fleshy enough to punch. He wants me to interview this chick Rachel who compiles erotica. Right now I'm reading her book about spanking. I have a spanking story on here. This book is a little more extreme for me. I like getting spanked but not hard. I'm a wimp when it comes to pains in the ass.

And yes I did get blown off by Mr Cyber Sex but he apologized. I still was able to used the vibrator while watching Victim of Love 2 which I will recap this weekend I promise. I just can't help touching myself when I watch it. So I can't take notes. It's not really hard core by today's standards but it is an awesome view of Christy and Jammie.

Enjoy the picture. I've been picture crazy lately!

2006-12-14T23:02:00.000-06:00

Don't you love my crude photoshop drawing. Want to see more? Buy a print! You know where to find me. I'll remind you anyway: alixxx13@gmail.com. Not a word about my stomach! My tits look great!

I have been at 4500 viewers for far too long. Tell your friends! I want to get to 5000. Actually I want to get to 20,000!

I love you guys you leave the best comments!

I was going to have Cyber sex but he had to go. The nerve! I was fingering myself and then putting my fingers in my mouth and he had to go!!!!! Oh the humanity!
I'm not melodramatic, just very descriptive.

More later I just wanted to leave the teaser pic.

2006-12-14T09:48:00.000-06:00

So I didn't smoke yesterday. Yes I smoked on Tuesday-I had three and I didn't smoke them all the way either. My house is staring to smell better but I feel so worn out. How long does this take? Can I do it?

Thanks all of you who have little blond friends. Too bad I don't live on the east coast Frothy. I do have a little black book because I am a slut and proud of it! So I found one. She was happy I was happy so was the guy. It was a happy time. Imagine how hard it was to not smoke after. Well I did, it was a couple of days ago. It's now like I have to go into a cave for a week to quit. I get home and I collapse on my couch because I have the black lung (cough, cough) and it's heavy. I heard that this is physical withdrawal. I don't need this shit right now. I have to be able to work. My mind is going to kill me.

I have a new upstairs neighbor. He's really loud! He woke up at 5:30 this morning and left his radio on! Fucker! I'm not fucking him!

Girls Gone Wild is getting what they deserve. I love drunk naked chicks but they sue and I'm surprised that this guy isn't in jail. Plus, who doesn't have release forms for this shit? Even I sign releases from photographers. I think this guy gets drunk before he makes his decisions. I used to do that I should give him a break. I actually wouldn't mind working for him. For some reason I have this ability to not look at the girls as victims like most women do. I don't get mad about exploitation. We've come far enough to know that we shouldn't be so uptight. I agree that I am a little too liberal and objectify women and men but I take full responsibility. I like that it turns me on.

I will get to the task of recapping Victim of Love 2 some time this weekend. I haven't updated Road to Christy Canyon in some time. I would do it at work but I get too horny. I have to go to the bathroom and wait for everyone to leave sometimes. I think people at work read this. So yeah, I do that-ha! Just don't go into the last stall after me.

I'll post another picture soon. I'm still selling them. My problem is that I love you guys so much that I give them away. If you want any you can contact me through MySpace. The link is to the right.

2006-12-12T16:26:00.000-06:00

I was going to post because Jenna Jameson is getting a divorce and I thought I found my little blond. But then I saw this . I thought it was funny. What guys do that? What happens when they get a girlfriend? How do I meet them? I might never get the answers. And yes I only really go to Best Week Ever for my blog gossip. Why go anywhere else?

2006-12-12T11:58:00.000-06:00

Sorry I never updated yesterday. I just watched Victim of Love 2 and I want to have oral sex with a little blond girl as soon as possible. I can't get it out of my head. It's all I thought about yesterday. I almost felt my friend's ass up. I'll have to find a little blond girl who will let me. That's hard in the Midwest. We are very uptight. Everybody here wants to get married and have kids. Two of my closest friends got married this year and my sister did last year. My sister is 7 years younger than me so whenever I go home i get the lecture about finding someone. I'm afraid to get married. What if I get bored. The last relationship I was in I lost interest and it scared me. I didn't know what to do or how to get out of it. So I think I was mean to the guy and he broke up with me. He might read this--sorry guy I last dated. But he also might not know if I'm talking about him so pretty much all my exes will think I'm talking about them. Carley Simon is here.

I have another meeting tomorrow. It's very cool to have meetings. They are usually counter productive and held only for people to hear themselves talk. But my meeting is a phone training session. So I suppose that it will be productive. Then I have to meet with the Executives. They will tease me. It will suck.

So tonight I'm going to try to watch this thing about the Baker kid called One Punk Under God The Jim and Tammy Baker kid intrigues me. I don't know why I will probably find him annoying. He holds his congregations in a bar. Do they get drunk and recite gospel? What the fuck kid?

So I have to figure out how I am going to get to New York twice and go to LA once. Airfare is much higher to LA than to New York. I've never been to New York. I'm so excited. It's so big and powerful. I hope I get laid a lot. I'll let you know.

2006-12-11T07:37:00.000-06:00

I may update this entry later so come back. I had to get rid of the below picture. I hate it. This is much better even though I'm not smiling and I'm smoking. Smoking looks sexy. I miss summer. I have too many clothes on right now.

2006-12-08T19:12:00.000-06:00

I look stoned in this picture. I was tired. The photographer liked it enough to put it on his list so I guess it's good. I call it "I want some more" or "come back over here, you're not done yet".
I look a little fat. I may be actually. Well, if you read this regularly then you know how much I weigh.

I'm trying to quit smoking again. I felt like I couldn't breathe all day. I came home and used my inhaler and felt better. Since I've been cutting back on the cigarettes, I am going through with drawl. I'm assuming that's why I feel like I'm having an asthma attack all the time. That is also why I felt like I was going to die all day.

I guess the shooter at the Citicorp building was killed. He killed two other people. This is so sad. I hate it when people die like that. I feel like doing something but there is nothing I can do. There is no "save people from getting shot" fund.
So I'm going to try not to think about it.

Frothy Afterbirth is awesome give him some love. He is in love with Alexandra Maria Lara. Or at lest he says she's really hot. Since she has my name I was a little intrigued. MrSkin doesn't have her on the site but she was in this movie called Downfall. The movie looks too serious for me but Alexandra is pretty hot. Good choice Frothy Afterbirth! FA and I have been close since the Drunken Stepfather post where two girls called me fat and he was one that defended my honor. See how mean girls can be to each other? Actually, I think we've been together longer. MySpace is a friend maker. It also is the devil. I wanted to give him my love and tell him I will be thinking about his fingers in me later.

Since I feel better my friend is coming over. She smokes though and I might be tempted. I had a dream and she was in it so I've been thinking about her all day. (I just made myself have to pee.) She should be here soon. With a bottle of vodka. I have the orange juice. She wanted to see the Christy video so I'm going to watch it with her and show her Christy Canyon. This will be the first time she's seen Christy Canyon in a video, or so she says. It's weird that people haven't seen Christy. Christy is permanently fixated in my brain. I can pull her up at any time. She's a household name in my house. So I'm teaching this girl a few things tonight. Should be fun.

2006-12-08T14:41:00.000-06:00

I got sexy new boots today! Merry Christmas to me!

There is a shooter in the train station today and the entire building is shut down. Today I feel like I'm dying of Cancer. I often think I have some horrible disease when I don't feel good. So this train station shooting puts that in perspective. The entire building is shut down and this shooter has a hostage. He shot people. Ouch. I hate guns! See how dangerous it is to be in the city! How the fuck am I going to get home? My route is closed! I hope this shooter is caught and beat up! Fucker!

My computer is very slow. There is something wrong with the internet. This means that I feel totally disconnected to the world and can not update my page from home this weekend. Unless the internet speeds up. It also means I will be watching porn all day Saturday and Sunday because it will be too cold to go outside. 5 degrees is not acceptable weather! I need to move! Fuck the cold! If I watch porn all weekend I can recap it for you. I have three at home that don't have names on them. So it will be a surprise to see what they are. I'm also getting Assault of the Party Nerds which will be a ball to watch. Richard Gabai should pay me, I love his movies!

No, Frothy Afterbirth, I will not be recapping all of Christy Canyon's movies. There are a bunch of movies that are no longer in print and some are not worth recapping. I watched Where the Boys Aren't (9?) and it wasn't really recap worthy. I love girl on girl scenes and had a great time watching it but there just isn't enough plot to write about.

Here is a guy who wrote to me about the amount of people who have seen my blog. He seems to be in search of positivity. Go visit his site so his numbers look good. I think that's why he commented. I honestly, have no idea if over 4000 visitors is good. I rarely go to anyone else's blog unless they write to me. I don't really care how many people see me I just care about the people who do and tell me how much they like it.

This guy likes to masturbate which is wonderful! He lives here too! I really feel for him because his friend wouldn't give it up for him when he helped her move. I would have at least given him a hand job. Especially if my vibrator is out. Geezz! Sorry guy!

I'm glad you all liked the picture. I try. I am masturbating. Getting my picture taken turns me on. I had to touch myself during the process. My cum face is much better than that. Just imagine me completely out of control and that's what I look like. I'm told it's hot. I've never seen it. I should tape it but cameras are usually an after thought. It's strenuous fucking me, so I think handling a camera is too much for my partners. As for me, I'm not about to spend money on that. I don't need to see it only feel it. Now I'm very horny! Dammit! I'm crossing my fingers that my computer works tonight. If not they will just go down my pants and stay crossed. This is an excellent way to keep your fingers when masturbating, by the way.

2006-12-07T00:41:00.000-06:00

I have been lax with the pictures. Here's one from the other night. I'm better now.

2006-12-06T16:36:00.000-06:00

This guy made my day! He started a blog just to talk to me and then he decided to write. Groovy! Thank god I'm not just a jerk-off tool. I love being a jerk-off tool but I don't want that to be all I am to you guys. He needs to write more-so chawkc, write more!

I didn't have my meeting yet. It's tomorrow. I prepared a little. I'm thinking about taking some stuff home but that would suck and I wouldn't look at it anyway. It's not that important of a meeting. But I want to seem like I know what I'm talking about. The meeting is a boring subject. Sorry.

I finally got the second copy of Victim of Love 2. I will watch it and recap it soon. I'm afraid it isn't the movie I want. They sent another movie with it but there is no name on it and I have no idea what it is. I'm scared because of the last recap I did. I was numb down there for a day. I masturbated too much. I didn't know it was possible to do that. Oh well, now I know. So i have to make sure I do this one slowly and not get so turned on I guess. I figured I would be grossed out with the older porn because of the wardrobe choices. I am a little but if I only spend time on the Christy parts I get really wet and then well...So I have to be careful. Once you've met someone and touched them it's so much better. I sat right next to her so I love watching her more now. We talked like normal people to each other. I didn't expect to talk dirty with her for an hour but I didn't expect to have such an easy time talking to her either. I probably say that a lot in these blogs. I did too much coke before so I have a really bad memory. don't do coke! it makes you forget-my advise for the day.

Thus I have spent enough time on this to pull me to 5pm and get me the hell out of this corner cube. Until I feel like writing again!

2006-12-05T15:21:00.000-06:00

So I just read here that they are going to start a new show with New York Flavor of Love. EW! She's gross and crazy! Why does she get her own show. I want my own show then! If she gets to have one how come I can't? This makes me very angry. I need a cigarette now!.

I just read this guys blog and he's adorable. Read it he gets drunk and fights with his girl friend. That's why I'm single pal. I still fight with my ex and it's really annoying. It's not my fault I can't hear him cause he's driving through the woods!

Here is a video you can watch of me in the shower with a bunch of other people. Julie Fab sent it and I can't look at it at work.

I am very busy and very not busy at the same time. I had this hour of manic work and now nothing. I can't go this speed-fast then slow. Today is dragging as it is. Then I found out I have a meeting on Thursday! Me, I have a meeting! Someone outside of this office actually wants to come in and meet me for some phone related stuff. I feel very powerful right now. I have no idea what this person was talking about two weeks ago when she called but I agreed to the meeting. And she's bringing her boss too. I sort of know what she is talking about-I'm not a complete idiot-but I now have to prepare. It's good that she called me to remind me because I would have been totally surprised on Thursday morning. I don't look at my calendar. I have four other peoples calendars to look at and manage I can't even contemplate mine.

Last night I watched part of the Wrestling show thing on the TV. Some chick was on and she was cute so I wanted to see. She and this big dude were in the ring yelling at eachother. She said that K-Fed is being trained to kick the other guy's ass. Is this true? Is K-Fed gonna be a wrestler? If so then I am totally watching!

And this is what I'll be doing for the rest of the day.

2006-12-02T09:20:00.000-06:00

I really like this picture. I'm not naked but it's a good one of me. I need to spend more time on my bed like this.
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I posted this then decided to write more. It's Saturday morning and I've already watched one episode of Moonlighting, figured out what was wrong with Blogger-there were problems, and re-read this interview which is really good you should check it out. I'm now waiting for the EP to call. He moved and I want to help him unpack-maybe. He'd better hurry because I might get onto some project and not be able to help him. But he has these Saturday morning rituals like eating breakfast. I don't have these well at least now I don't. I had to go to two doctors in the last week and got weighed and I don't feel like eating. I'll eat little somethings for a while and immerse myself into making clothing until I get down to my comfortable weight which is 130 in case you are wondering. I'm not about to lie and say I weigh like 110. Who wants that with big boobs I need support and I'm never going to get down to the 104 I weighed in High school. So 130 it is.

I was on the phone with my friend last night and he pointed out to me how much I've been through in the last couple of weeks. I was feeling guilty about not blogging or sewing. So here's a recap:
Friday I got stuck in an elevator for 30 minutes. It made me cry which leads me to believe that I'm claustrophobic and didn't know it. But with that subway derailment and fire thing I've had my share of almost dying this year and I really don't want anymore. But shit comes in three's so I'm going to be holding on for dear life for the next 30 days.
Saturday and Sunday I had a photo shoot. Lots of fun the pictures are great now if I could just figure out how to photo shop them properly I'll be happy to start posting them.
Monday I went to the gyno to you know make sure everything was OK down there. He asked when I was last tested for all STD's and I said "like never" and so he gave me every test imaginable. So with the holiday I had to wait over a week to find out if I had HIV, herpes, syphilis, the clap and all others-there is a list. I'm all clear of everything-I like safe sex-but what a wait.
Tuesday and Wednesday I woke up and couldn't talk and had a fever of 103 so you can imagine I thought I was dying of AIDS and that this would be my last Thanksgiving. So I stayed home from work the next two days because all I could do was sleep and company policy states that you do not get paid for the holiday unless you worked the day before or after. But the doctor told me to stay home and sleep because I had some upper respiratory thing. And since I was a temp before and was hired full time just recently my sick pay didn't start until November 30. AW shit! Benefits are getting shittier and shittier each year.
Thursday I went to my parents house-well I was already there I took the train out on Wednesday. I slept all day and woke up to my mom, dad, and aunt to eat. No sister this year, she and her husband went to another place which is stupid because my parents are the best cooks in the world and despite how annoying they are you eat good. My aunt, sorry, great aunt was drunk from martini's and cried a little. She does this a lot and I always want to burst out laughing. She drives my mother insane and my sister insists that she killed our grandmother.
Friday, I got into a fight with my mother and left to go back into the city. She though I was acting strange. Well I had a fever. There's more to that but I don't want to get into it. She's just worried because I'm alone and all the pornography I'm involved with scares her. I don't do fuck films Ma relax!
Saturday-Saturday pretty much nothing. I returned to work. It was really warm so I got my coat dry cleaned. Then it got really cold and snowed and my coat is as dirty as it was before I brought it in to the cleaner. I got into a fight with my friend and we probably won't speak for the next few years. She's a Sagittarius, very stubborn. Which brings me to right now. And I'm probably going to make something today instead of helping the EP because I just looked at my sewing machine and it has some dust on it! I bought all this stuff to make a santa skirt and top for the calendar and the EP's next Sexual Freedom show. So that will be what I'll be doing today.

2006-12-01T13:44:00.000-06:00

So it snowed last night and this morning here in Chicago. My commute was almost two hours most of it slipping in the snow. I don't do sensible boots. All of my shoes are ridiculous and have no practicality to them at all. Except for one pair of gym shoes that are too big that I used to do step aerobics with. I'm a total shoe whore and I like em high heeled. My ass in the air is all I care about. It's important to have that proper posture. A girl friend of mine in NY says she keeps a pair of running shoes on her at all times because of the 9-11 thing. I work right next to the Sears Tower. If it blows up I can't run. It'll be fast hopefully. But I don't want to die cause there are so many shoes I have to have right now...

And Men! Myspace is stupid, why is there a relationship status thing on there? I get these dumb little crushes and then find out they are in relationships and wish I knew their password so I could go in and change it just to make myself feel better. I'm always in a relationship but I don't advertise because that wont stop me from bringing someone new home. It never does. I don't cheat when the guys get serious but I honestly would rather cheat. It's their call not mine. I want to be able to fuck all my guys that I talk to all over the country whenever I want to. "in a relationship" bla bla bla. Violins are playing softly in the background while champagne pops by a nice warm fire. Suck my dick! Or Glass dildo if Danger ever makes one for me.

The whole "in a relationship" thing fucks me up because now when I masturbate to said person I can't help but think about the other person in the picture. So I have to go to the old stand by-Bruce Willis. Actually, Bruce always is in my masturbation fantasies. I have the biggest schoolgirl crush on Bruce Willis that I masturbate to every movie he's in. I have a bunch DVR'd and I just rented the entire Moonlighting series. It's so cheesy when he brings out his harmonica in those first episodes and Cybil Shepherd looks at him lovingly. But I eat it up. I want Bruce juice all over my body at least once in my life.

So maybe I should quit my job cause if the Sears Tower is attacked I might miss out on Bruce Juice.

2006-11-15T23:25:00.000-06:00

Last night Netflix was in the mailbox. The movie inside was Thinking XXX. I'm not a big documentary fan and it seemed to center around the photography of Timothy Greenfield-Sanders. Sanders is a famous photographer that I've never heard of. I only pay attention to fashion photography and there are so many photographers out there today that I can't keep up. I could really care less who makes George Bush look smarter or who captures Nicole Kidman's inner sadness. The photos I saw in the movie were really good and I wouldn't mind getting my picture taken by him, but I'm not important enough so I'll have to put that on my never going to happen list.

Here's my thoughts on the movie:

Nina Hartley talks way too much. But I want to meet her. She has a lot to say and it all made sense. I did not want to meet her husband the same time as she showed us their play room which was fully equip with whips, latex costumes and contraptions to hang upside down from. At least they still have a healthy sex life. Nina is really great looking for her age but the thought of her hanging upside-down giving her husband with a BJ just makes me think of seeing my parents do it. I want my parents to do it and I hope they do but I really don't want to know about it. I'd rather see it in he movies. What was really great was that she let us watch her lift weights and do tricep dips in a thong and topless. Her European trainer doesn't mind that she prefers to workout in the nude. Oh those Europeans! She was great!

Jesse Jane was adorable but her boobs knocked me off the couch and it hurt! She needs to be careful with those things! She worked out for us too but kept her clothes on. Jesse Jane looks like the "Girls Next Door" at the Playboy mansion. Plastic with white hair and super tits. I half expect her boobs to be hard like a Barbie doll's. She probably wouldn't feel it if my dog chewed them off. She's cute and at least she admitted to getting all the plastic surgery done to her. She also admitted liking the attention.

Gina Lynn was very prominent in the movie too. I kept wanting to brush her hair. Great ass! But that hair! Wow! It had multiple personalities. Neat because I love everything out of the ordinary but I was a bit confused. At one point Gina was sitting with her husband and he said that he always wanted to be in Hustler and that he finally was. She added that he was in it with her. Might have stole his thunder a bit because he definitely did not get the Hustler spread on his own. Gina then confesses that she and her husband don't always have sex every week because sometimes after having sex a bunch of times during the day she's just too sore when she gets home. Poor husband guy. Gina is one I would like to meet too. She said that women should wait until they are at least 21 before they get into the business. She added that most 18 year olds come in, do a movie then leave and think it's the worst thing they've ever done. She may be right there. To add my own two cents and to support the stereotype, it seems that 18 year olds who have been abused seem to stay longer. Most likely because they think they aren't good at anything else. But I'm not writing a term paper here so on to the next one.

Tera Patrick was very impressive. She's married to some tattooed monstrosity named Evan Seinfeld. He was on VH1's Supergroup with Ted Nugent and the Skid Row drunk guy Sebastian Bach. Tera Patrick shows up on the show Supergroup and poses with Sebastian’s wife. All hell breaks loose cause everyone gets a hard on and Sebastian gets mad and drunk. Anyway, Tera, despite having fake tits is naturally beautiful and I prefer her without all the makeup. Regarding her personal life she admits that she probably disappointed her husband because she doesn't really like to get freaky. She likes it missionary and not 4 hours long despite what she does on film. Somehow I don't think her husband minds. He was a monstrosity but a cute monstrosity. Without all the tattoos, Evan is the type of guy I like to go for.

Jenna Jameson was the most talked about yet she talked the least. I guess she figures she's said enough. (I think) Sunrise Adams was so excited to work with Jenna that after her first scene she declared she was never going to wash her face again because it had Jenna juice all over it. That's awesome! So Marsha Brady and Davey Jones! She could have sold it on eBay! Jenna is absolutely beautiful and I can't wait to start reading her book. I have two books to read before hers.

Savanna Samson took my breath away. She's like the new version of Shannon Tweed. Stunning! I'm not into blonds but I like her and want her juice on my face. Maybe I am into blonds. She was real too. Not huge tits but real ones. It's good to see that.

Chloe, the orgasm face of the century, looks good. She was one of those girls I couldn't get enough of. My favorite part of porn is watching the girls faces when they cum and hers is the best! I used to rewind it over and over just to get off as many times as I could until I got too sore to continue.

Ginger was cute but only on for about a minute. What's up with that? I would think she'd have much more to say than Gina Lynn and Jesse Jane. I guess with the new wave of porn stars the producers thought we wouldn't care what Ginger had to say as much as we cared about what the hair and tits had to say. Disappointing! Ginger dated Charlie Sheen for Christ’s sake! She was one of the first, if not the first to get royalties. In the film she says she feels insecure with her clothes on in front of a camera but as soon as they come off she's ready to go. Hello! Huge opportunity to get into the minds and insecurities of porn stars. It makes total sense to dig deeper into that. But all of a sudden we are looking Jesse Jane in a pool talking about how much she likes attention.

Christy Canyon looked fantastic. This is the only movie that you can view Christy on at MrSkin. I remember after the EP got the stills from this movie he sent me a picture of Christy next to a picture of me and said the resemblance was uncanny. Best compliment I got from him all year. (The "best sex ever" was from the year before). Unfortunately they didn't spend a lot of time on Christy either. She said that women get into porn now so they can make more money as strippers later and that when she was starting out it was completely different. She goes on to say that she was broke and 18 when she started and didn't think she had many choices at the time. I cover much more in my interview and I'm sure you will all be happy with what I wrote.

I was surprised to see Sharon Mitchell. She looked great after being such a drug addict for so many years. I expected her to be manlier and not as pretty but she was extremely beautiful. Here is another prime example of a strong woman in porn that the producers of the film completely ignored. She really turned her life around, got her degree and helps people with AIDS.

I was very happy to see Peter North! There were a few other men stars but I can't remember their names. I'll add more later when I get home along with links. Some of the guys were uncircumcised which fascinates me. I've never been with an uncircumcised guy. I'm intrigued. Plus they were huge! Big like the EP!

Overall, Thinking XXX was OK. If you want to see some of the most beautiful women in porn naked, not having sex and talking a it about themselves than this is for you. But if you want to learn something new about the porn industry if any of these stars then you might want to see if they wrote any books.This is only my opinion and not a reflection of how I feel personally about these girls, but it seems that despite the notoriety of this photographer, the importance of the new porn stars seemed to dominate the documentary. Cute as they are I would think that a renowned photographer would want to hear more from the women who made the business what it is today. There was also no yesterday vs. today commentary, which is so apparent in the appearance of these girls. This movie should have been a special feature to the book and not an actual movie. A free gift with the 1st 1000 copies sold or something.

Next up:

Porn Star: The Legend of Ron Jeremy
Inside Deep Throat
Pornography: Disc 1

2006-11-13T22:03:00.000-06:00

This is my sad attempt at reviewing a movie: I'm no Roger Ebert, but the links are fun

I opened an account at netflix a few weekends ago. I ordered a bunch of Michelle Bauer movies. I'm pretty fascinated by Michelle Bauer. I saw her in Cafe Flesh which is masterpiece! I recommend it highly if you haven't seen it already. I'll talk more about Cafe Flesh and how many of my boyfriends got me naked while watching it with me in a later post.

The first Michelle Bauer movie I got in the mail was Attack of the 60 Foot Centerfolds. This movie was pretty impossible to watch and coming from me that's pretty amazing. Fred Olen Ray directed this bogus tit flick probably with a blindfold on. I like Fred's movies most of the time. They look like fun and I always wish I was part of the set crew when I watch them. But something went wrong here.

The movie begins with all the promise of greatness and I was excited to spend the next 90 minutes wasting my time watching boobies popping out all over the place. The opening titles were scored with a cheesy sci-fi track over a crazy cloud filled background. Classic! It was going to be better than I imagined. But then the credits lasted too long way too long. A whole cigarette length long! Finally, people appear. They are in a science lab. Dr Lindstrom (John Lazar-This is my happening and it freaks me out!), Dr Joyce Mann (Michelle Bauer), and Dr Eric Kramer (George Stover). They inject something into a rat and it becomes huge. Oh my God!

The next scene is a photo shoot with 2 blonds and a redhead in bikini's. J.J. North plays Angel the lead babe. Angel is sweet with pretty sour fake tits. Hot but I'm more into natural boobs. I think even small natural oobs are better than fake ones. The only good thing fake tits do is look better in a sweater. Once the sweater comes off it's all over. This is coming from a girl who never had to worry about her boobs being too small. I'm no an expert when it comes to too small booby trama. But I do know that having big ones isn't alwys fun and games. I can't run at all! I would have to wear three bras if I decided to be in a marathon. There are a lot of problems with big boobies-read my booby story!

Inga played by Raelyn Saalman has nice natural titties. A bit small for me but nice tan lines babe! And UGH! Betty played by Tammy Parks has to have the worst fake boob job I've seen since that fake boob move where Ross from Friends plays the fake boob doctor and is confronted by some poor chick whose boobs got all lumpy and gross! (Who was that? I had to watch that nad count the tits in that. Can you imagine. There is this whole montage of boobs talking at the end and I had to figure out how many of them there were by paying attention to their clothing. I promise to do a whole linking post on that movie when I get home.) Betty's really pretty otherwise but she has that weird Tori Spelling Canyon cleavage problem. Her cleavage is shaped like a disfigured U. I'm not very articulate tonight sorry.

AW! Fuck this! The chicks get really and big flop their boobs all over LA. Superwoman comes and saves them with the super antidote ray. The geeky photographer gets Angel in the end. The nasty photographer gets Betty but she blows up. The fake Hefner, owner of the fake mag Playthings, gets a huge tranquilizer dart shot into his ass but is saved by Inga because she's ok and has real boobs. And I spit on Fred Olen Ray for not getting Nikki Fritz or Michelle Bauer naked! Shame Shame!

That sucked you guys! I'm sorry! Here look pussy licking!

We could be Naked!

2006-11-08T12:32:00.000-06:00

History of my perversion...well a part of it.

Every time I was in a stressful or uncomfortable situation my brain would automatically go to sex. The earliest memory of this is being in school, probably grade school-old enough to know about sex but younger than menstruation. I was being scolded by a teacher, a very unattractive man teacher. I was a rebellious child. I think this scolding was when I beat up some kid for making fun of my overdeveloped chest. He called me socks and I beat the shit out of him. Anyway, sitting in the office after seeing the very embarrassed father of the kid I just beat up (devastated that his son sexually harassed a girl and she beat him up), I was being reprimanded by the principal and all the stress and confusion was too much for me. My mind went blank for a minute then all of a sudden I thought of him touching me. Touching my new size 32B bra with the pink bow on it. I tried really hard to stop thinking about it. But pushing that out of my head only led me into thinking about him taking his pants off and letting me play with him. Touch it and kiss it. Then he said something to the effect of "we are sorry that this boy was improper with you, but you should have come to us sooner before you decided to (rip his face apart). You have detention for a week." I then realized that I wasn't wrong for beating the kid up. I also realized that they were letting me off easy because I did in fact ask them form help and they did nothing. But because I had those naughty thoughts I forgot to say anything and just left. I never went to detention. I knew I didn't have to.

Throughout my life I dealt with these uncomfortable situations by imagining being naked with whoever I was with. It never happened with my friends or family. It only happened with people in authority. I remember getting a ticket and being in court imagining giving the judge a blow job underneath his desk as he told me to go to driving school. I thought it several times with school counselors, therapists and college art teachers. Many of them women. I thought I was a sinner. They tell you in Sunday School that evil thoughts are sins too. But I am a rebel and I went immediately to porn. And it's probably why I am here today. I'd also like to add that in my adolescence I had this weird fear that people could read my mind and the subject of my sinful thought knew somehow what I was thinking. Ha! Weirdo!

I don't have thoughts like that much anymore since I finally have an outlet for my sexual frustration. It's much more fun and rewarding than sitting across the desk of some unattractive victim of my perversion. I wonder if they knew that we could be naked.